It’s my dad’s birthday today, getting him a present at lunch.

He’s 71. What do I get him? Thanks.

Does he like boats?

Something from the garden centre


Variety box of pornography.



It’s already been done. Proper end-of-days stuff



A trip in one of Richard Brandon’s space planes.

got my dad a firestick so he could watch the grand tour and he was absolutely made up

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A son that’s not asking for present advice on his birthday

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Mushroom Log.

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I think at that age I wouldn’t give a flying fuck tbqh, just get him something like a nice pen.

You’ve not given us much to go on here, so I spoke to your dad, and he said that he’d like a set of spokey dokeys.

Got him two books and a Costa gift card. Frankly, he’ll love that. Also got the two of them an Amazon Fire stick the other day, but for The Crown/Star Trek not The Grand Tour.

I did like Epimer’s idea though.


Was my old man’s 70th last year and I was short of inspiration. I had a brief look into getting him a Mont Blanc pen…

Fuck ME was I was way off with my idea about how much those things cost.

A hooker?