How do you know when you're drunk?

For me it’s when my feet start tingling and I can’t feel them.

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Or when I start talking about how much I love Feeder

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I trip over my words.

Whenever it happens my brain does a weird split second thing that says to me “you just fucked up there, go back and say the sentence again so people don’t think you’re wrecked” or I start to overthink if the thing I’ve just said actually makes sense or if I’ve made myself look like a complete drunken idiot who can’t speak. It’s an overthink/anxiety thing and it’s never as bad as my brain makes it out to be.

… I’m sober whilst typing this by the way, honest.

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When I’m very, very sad, full of self-loathing and want to throw up

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Someone tells me I’m shouting

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When I think I look hot/fit

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I join in conversations

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When I feel a lil bit fuzzy

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When I need the toilet and have to stop and think through how many drinks I’ve already had, even if it’s just two.

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weird how once you reach the threshold for needing a pee you just have to go ever 20 minutes after you’re drunk

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My first year of university I was told at a freshers event you should have three pints minimum before going to the toilet or else you’d be bursting constantly. Never heard of the concept since but why would first year college students lie to sound impressive or fuck with naive younguns?

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I only know the next day

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When I play Phil Collins at a very loud volume.

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Alright Steven Gerrard

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My lips get warm and tingly.

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just ate a whole packet of chocolate digestives without noticing. Probably a sign

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That’s me sober, right there

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Make conversation on public transport

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Yeah, the artists i only really listen to when three sheets to the wind find their way on to the stereo - Meatloaf, Pogues, and for some reason Elton John.

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Start talking Janner

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