How's your depression?


#2088

I can assure you that you’re just as cool etc as most dissers I’ve met, even though you don’t feel that way. (Nor do I about myself tbh. Insecurity eh!)

Keep safe and speak soon x


#2089

In fact, you’ve met Bontcho Guentchev, which makes you instantly cooler than most :wink:


#2090

Dan Carlin hardcore history. Just this ace American bloke with a really endearing, geeky enthusiasm for history, telling the stories in a really simple and engaging way. Listen to blueprint for Armageddon, his series about WW1. Like hanging out with a cool uncle.


#2091

I’m in probably the worst place I’ve been for a few years now. One way I know it’s a depressive episode is the fact that it’s christmas - my fave time of year ffs - and I can’t muster any enthusiasm for it or anything else. All I’ve been doing and want to do is sleep and eat unhealthy beige food and hide from the world. I look at other people having a great time on Instagram and read these boards because I only have enough energy to observe instead of take part. I really hope this passes soon.


#2092

Not replying to anyone specifically but hugs to everyone in this thread. The build-up to Christmas and the Christmas period itself makes my anxiety/depression go absolutely crackers. Very difficult not to slip into old habits.

So not to preach but make sure to have time for yourself where you can do something that is minimal effort/stress. @Bamnan mentions podcasts above and they can be really great. A half hour walk with the headphones in can make the world of difference. No help too small.


#2093

Worried the news about Jonghyun is going to send me in a downward spiral. At work and trying not to cry :slightly_frowning_face:


#2094

You’re amazing mate. I’m sorry you’re feeling like this, and I get it, but I just really hope you know how great everyone thinks you are- myself included. :heart:


#2095

just reading about that, so sad :frowning_face:


#2096

Thanks, man. I really appreciate this <3

People here are so lovely!

Having no self-worth is a real fucker, as I’m sure others that post in this thread. Thankfully, I got some really good sleep over the weekend so feel less morose now.


#2097

pfffft, totally untrue. just look at how much your replies have helped people and how much you’ve opened up to people in this thread!!!

really feel bad about leaving so quickly on Saturday, hopefully there will be another gathering at some point.


#2098

Really sorry to hear about this PM. I’m not sure exactly what to say except I hope it doesn’t hit you too hard :frowning:


#2099

i’ve never met you but you seem ace x


#2100

Yeah, thanks pniks.

Things were feeling pretty raw all of a sudden when I left the pub on Saturday evening and found it really hard to see things objectively.

Really appreciate you taking the time to reply :slight_smile:


#2101

Thanks, man. Same goes for you from my end as well. Hope you’re well at the moment.


#2102

Not doing so well atm pals. It’s the office xmas lunch today and I can’t face going and joining in the festivities. I feel too anxious and sad and broken. I’m supposed to be going on the work xmas night out tomorrow but now I’m desperately thinking of ways to get out of it.

I wish I could just deal with being around people. I quite like people, I guess, on balance. But I just can’t do it.

So yeah. High five to #teamanxietyisruiningmyChristmas


#2103

I know the feeling CH. If you can, make it through lunch and escape at the first opportunity then flake on tomorrow - be “ill” or something if you’re not sure how to do it.


#2104

I think I might have to. There’s next to nothing pressing I need to do here anyway. I’d managed to get myself into a place where I was actually quite looking forward to going out with the people here though so I’m really pissed at myself now that’s disintegrated.


#2105

For what it’s worth, I surprised myself last week once I made it out - I was expecting to do lunch and run off, and stayed out until about 10 in the evening once it got going because I felt surprisingly comfortable and enjoyed myself, but I know that a few months ago I’d have cringed at the idea of inflicting my “company” on the others and found an excuse to get away fairly sharpish.

Frustrating when it happens, innit, but it’ll get better eventually, even if it’s being a pain in the arse this year.


#2106

I had an appointment with the doctor this week and started on 50mg Sertraline each day. I also began taking Sertraline three years ago almost to the very day until late summer in the following year.

The depressive symptoms I have experienced this winter are exactly the same as I experienced three years ago, it’s really weird. However I’m optimistic about it because when I was last taking it worked wonders for me (once the initial side effects abated).

What is more concerning though is that I saw this winter’s spell of depression coming a mile off, with the symptoms starting to appear gradually around the autumn. I tried everything I could to ward it off, increased exercise, ate well, meditated, and although I thought it was making a difference the more serious depression arrived anyway come the winter. Maybe this is going to be a regular pattern now every couple of years, unless I can identify some elusive root cause that I can address.


#2107

Yeah, I have rare nights like that. Those are nice when they happen. I’ve been this way since I was a kid though and I can’t seem to find any way to either get consistently comfortable. And my energy for gritting my teeth and push through them seems to be at an all time low.

Maybe next year.