How's your depression?


#2308

Yeah my body image plays a fairly part in my overall negativity, I think. Was very down on the way I looked throughout my early teens due to comments I used to receive consistently from a lot of people (often not even maliciously), but then when I was no longer in a school environment I became less exposed to those sort of comments, and the insecurities just gradually faded. Eventually I became more confident and sort of liked the way I looked, but now that just seems ridiculous and I’m embarrassed that I ever felt anything other than negativity about myself (as silly as I know that sounds).

Kind of puts me off all aspects of life really; uncomfortable being around people because my face is just unpleasant to look at. I (rightfully) feel guilty about even thinking these things because I know that it shouldn’t matter and physical appearance isn’t a measure of any virtue, but idk, I’m probably quite shallow anyway.

Also I know it’s not just distorted self-perception because I used to pathetically ‘like’ everyone on tinder with the sole intention of a selfish confidence-boost; never got any non-robot matches, and that was with me using overly flattering selfies. :joy:

Sorry for derailing the helpful positivity etc.


#2309

couple of thoughts:

1 a solid way of being truly happy to 100% understand and accept who you are. realising how true navajo’s first sentence here is makes getting there a fraction easier

2 if you accurately know your strengths and weaknesses you will (should) work according to them, asking others for assistance when you need it. this means things get done a lot better than if you assume you’re good at everything - because no one is!


#2310

i should have some music work for you soon

i believe this contradicts your statement a bit :blush:


#2311

Again, no need to apologise for simply posting about how you feel in this thread - it’s what we’re here for.


#2312

I’ve not been here for a while and I feel really selfish and guilty but I just can’t be in here when things are going a bit better, maybe in time I can help others and they’ve graciously helped me.

For me, I’m on mood stabilisers for bipolar which has spawned out of having ADHD as a child (have I explained this already? I dunno) which a doctor here in Germany pretty much diagnosed within 15 minutes of meeting me that no one in the UK ever did (NOT SLAGGING OFF THE NHS, LOVE THE NHS, JUST SAYING).

Anyway, I seem to have balanced out, but a side effect of the meds is that I’ve put on weight which is quite hard to shift. I guess that’s preferable to feeling like utter shit all the time eh?

Hope people struggling in here are doing ok and if anyone wants an ear to blether in just give me a shout


#2313

Hey man,

There’s any need to apologise for not dipping into the thread to support - if you find yourself unable to pop in when things are going better then no-one’s going to begrudge you that!

It’s so good to hear that you’re doing better and are feeling balanced. It sounds like the doc in Germany was pretty amazing with his diagnosis, that’s so awesome. And yeah, personally speaking I’d take a little (more) weight gain over feeling utterly repugnant on a daily basis, for sure.

Truly hope things continue on the upward trajectory for you :slight_smile:


#2314

her* diagonsis :wink:

but thanks!


#2315

Man, I’m such a rabid dinosaur!

Back to the 1970s with me! :confused::wink:


#2316

fairly bleak few days fellow sad lads - not had any good sleep since wednesday, can hear my brain whirring. got in a fight with a man at a bus station and banged my head. cant keep myself to myself in this mood.

one of the plans for this year was to not take any sleepers so i don’t have any and i could really use some.

:man_shrugging:


#2317

Best mate is still writing long Facebook posts to try and explain where he’s at. Various friends are commenting on or reacting to them and I reacted to a few of the early ones, but then there was an extremely bleak and upsetting one which made me sick with worry. Now I feel like I can’t respond to them at all. There are no words or reactions that are right or enough. There’s nothing anyone can do. The long and bleak post was largely about the reasons he won’t get medical help. (The system has treated him like shit.)

I hate myself for not being able to do or say anything, I hate myself for feeling like that when I know nothing will make a difference, and most of all I hate myself for feeling sorry for myself when he’s suffering so much. I can’t really talk to anyone about it properly and a few people I’ve tried to speak to have either just done :frowning: faces or said he’ll get over it. I’m sure he will but I’m terrified something will tip him over into doing something drastic (and I’m afraid I might say the wrong thing especially knowing that I already have triggered him a few times without meaning to or realising it). :confused:


#2318

can you go hang out with him and try and do something you both enjoy seperate from the issue? Obviously don’t know your situation so apologies if this isn’t helpful.

Sometimes when I was really low it helped to find a part of my life I could enjoy that wasn’t associated with how crap I felt, though it was hard to do! Ended up watching loads of Curb Your Enthusiasm, worked for me!


#2319

is an early night a possibility? Find some kinda boring podcasts? Hope you feel better soon x


#2320

cheers bam, an early night sounds like a great idea if my brain would let me do that - it’s not through lack of trying to sleep, just insomnia being a dick.

been on a long bike ride and I’m gonna not eat anything and maybe have a few cans and see if proper physical exhaustion will kick in. x


#2321

I’m free for a drink like, whenever, dude. hmu x


#2322

yeah I’m really struggling with sleep too lately, I think it’s so crucial though, times in my life where I’ve managed to get a solid 8 hours a night and get up earlyish are always when I feel the most happy and able to cope with things


#2323

thanks for the offer but i think my natural hermit tendencies might be the right way to go at the moment, social stuff doesn’t go well when i’m scrambled like this.

i do really appreciate you trying to look out for me though, and will defo have to get a drink sometime, hopefully when neither of us are in crisis mode. x


#2324

yeah it’s dead important for me too, had a nice plan for this new year of

*good sleep hygeine
*some exercise but not ridiculous amounts,
*don’t take (as many) drugs.

insomnia cocking the first one
bad joints making the second one hard in this weather
dont feel any better for not taking drugs, maybe worse.

ahhh whatamalike


#2325

Hey Bam, yeah it’s a complicated sitch- he lives bear Milton Keynes which is really far away from me, so I usually only see him once a month at best. I did offer to come up and visit him but he’s not feeling up to seeing people or even having 1 on 1 conversations online at the moment :frowning: but thanks for the suggestion! I know he’s been watching a lot of sport in the meantime so maybe I should clue up on how his football team are doing.


#2326

It sounds difficult for sure, hope you all find some good progress soon!

it’s great that you are worried for him but also remember to take time to treat yourself nicely so you can help others too :slight_smile:


#2327

current anxiety level: through the roof