was supposed to meet some mates for a drink tonight and they’ve both cancelled and for some reason this has made me depressed af. like, really, really miserable. feel like i’m stagnant tbh, just wasting my life and doing absolutely nothing. can barely make it out of the door tbh and i think i need to leave and go somewhere else for a while but i have no money and no idea what i’m doing with my life and feel like the time to decide all that is pretty much gone tbh. this is an extremely weird headspace to be in right now.
I’m so sorry you feel like this I empathise with a lot of it - making poor choices with diet, not being able to imagine yourself as an elderly person, putting things off - although I have the opposite problem to your original point: I’m incapable of properly living in the present; I’m constantly building up to when I move out and when I get a decent job and am generally living in this complete fantasy world of what my life will be like in a few months, only to compound my misery by finding myself still in the same dead-end job and still living with my parents a few months on.
I completely empathise with these bits, especially the first bit.
Thank you <3 and I’m sorry you’re having to go through this too, it really sucks. I know what you mean exactly about living in the future too!
I really need to get my shit together. Drink/spend less, excercise/focus more
Also I have zero money and I’m in a city I don’t live in anymore and I’m alone and can’t find help and fuck
Sounds rough. Hope you sort it out. Have you got any income at all? What would it cost you to get back home, wherever that is?
So right now I’m back in Glasgow for the next week and a bit (staying at a friends for free) I’ve done a couple freelance jobs while here but won’t get paid for a while for them. If I were to go back to my parents (Norwich) I have a train going to London on 31st and I could probably find a lift from there. My parents don’t exactly have loads of money though so aren’t really sure how to help. My girlfriend who’s currently in Germany is getting tired/unable of sending money to my pretty unhealthy account which is constantly getting charged for overdraft limit and I’m just terrible with the little money I do have it seems. I am supposed to be doing a masters as well as German lessons and internship with a magazine next month, so I do have things to go back to, but between here and there (two weeks) it feels like a gulf. I don’t really know what to do because I’ve got to myself in a really sorry state and I don’t know how or where to get help
Also maybe going back to Germany sadly isn’t right just now
Sounds like there’s light at the end of the tunnel at least. What about a few days of soul-crushing manual work for temp agencies? Might keep you busy and at least give you a bit of money in your pocket until the end of the month. Been in similar situations a few times and the routine and repetitiveness of a few shifts, no matter how mind-numbing sort of helped me focus a bit.
I had a bit of a look at that but wasn’t really sure how to go about it as I’ve never done that before, and it would also be quite short notice to try and get something, say, for this week coming? Do you have any advice with that? I do agree though, both in terms of money and focus, working all day yesterday one a one-day promotional thing gave me something even if it wasn’t the most exciting thing in the world. Today I just feel empty though until I get paid for that.
I’m just not sure I’m in a mentally (or financially) stable enough place to be living in another country. My girlfriend has tried her best to help me with everything but it doesn’t appear to be enough for me to get over myself. That might change with a more solid routine when/if I go back, but at the moment it’s quite hard to even picture even being able to do any of that right now
Literally just a case of making a list and spending a day in town going around different places filling in forms. Most of them don’t even ask for a CV, but you will need proof of ID and your bank details. Bit of filing, or industrial cleaning, or production line work for a week or two. It’s not going to cure your depression, but it might help you out of a hole short-term you 'til you can get back to London.
Probably something you’ve thought about but how much is it to get to Edinburgh? Bet there’s some 12 hour bar shifts going at festival venues
Through Facebook I’ve been offered sone gardening work, so that could be something!
I did have a look at that, but again I think it’s a bit too late now, that and travel costs might not make it worthwhile
do you have any previous experience doing that? I really want to get into environmental kind of work, including working in gardens.
(is it just second season Simpsons iodine stuff for an old lady)
Beyond my mum having a garden when I was a wee guy no not really
oh right, cool
who is it for, what kind of work exactly?
I’ve always kind of wanted to do something like that. The wet days are probably horrid, but it’s money in your pocket, exercise and air in your lungs all in one.
Quite an easy way to start a business of your own as well down the line if you like it.
Why are so many of us on here in an absolute pickle? Is everyone on earth just fucked but doesn’t say anything? What is it like to not have irrational anxiety or ocd? Seems like everyone has something like it. Is our generation just a bunch of cry babies? I hope not. Maybe if I was a proper man and went in the army and voted Tory id be alright.
to struggle is human.
It’s all good though, I wouldn’t say we’re all fucked at all, just all have different battles to face. The good thing is there are millions of people out there who can empathise with your situation!