The fourth thing is this is NOT a pyramid scheme!!!11
I wouldn’t say there is no joy in work, the cliche of cringey office banter can be a thing but I have a few good experiences of enjoying working with people, and if you end up doing something that matches what you good at there is some satisfaction in doing it. guess the biggest positive I associate it with is relief, I so easily could have ended up in long term unemployment
I’m a gardener and a bartender right now
It’s far better than office work
Well it must be hard to enjoy work when you don’t have a job.
Great post. Have you had any joy in offering this advice to others? There are people I know that I think would benefit from this, but people just look at me baffled when I talk about changing their context and perspective. Like “how the hell can I do that?”. It’s like telling someone to “just be happy”.
if the idea of the mundane 9-5 fills you with dread, perhaps it’s time to look at other alternatives for generating revenue. not working is simply not an option in the long term, unfortunately.
do what @Ruffers does. a little here, a little there. something pure, like gardening, which is great for the soul.
get 3 or 4 jobs - say stacking the shelf for 10 hrs. easy. no stress. maybe work in a cafe or bar for other times. work outdoors with the hands. get a job in the summer, working in beach shack. in the winter, do a solid stint at royal mail, pumping in postcodes whilst listening to tunes. better to have 2 jobs that don’t crush your soul too much than 1 that absolutely fills you with dread, which in turn can, and usually does, have an effect on both your physical and mental well-being.
if you want to make money whilst sitting in your pants drinking tea, buy and sell shit on gumtree/ebay. pick up a wardrobe for £60 - sell it for a ton. hit car boots every Saturday and Sunday. buy records, dvd’s, other trinkets. sell them for profit.
learn about a specific product. my friend specialises in watches, for example. he hits every car boot in town, picks up a watch for a fiver, buffs that bitch up and sells it for 20x of the original outlay.
I can go on and on, but my point is - if the humdrum of the daily trudge is getting you down and you a)are not too bothered about having many 0000’s in your bank account and b) don’t have dependents/mortgage/other responsibilities, then it is relatively easy to get out the rat race and live pure jazz life.
Idk I think maybe on the one hand when you talk about not saying three words to people due to anxiety, that’s def gotta be one of the big things making enjoying a job harder - or I more mean maybe it’s not jobs in general you don’t get it’s just that with things as they currently are a lot of jobs involve social aspects etc and that might be putting you off of the idea in general? Easy for me to say I know but if your anxieties are that bad it’s def worth talking to someone about it.
I’d love to pretend that I was a go getter who has always loved the idea of careers and so on but tbh I’ve only ever been happy when I was writing. Started in magazines and thought I’d hit the jackpot in getting to work with words and being creative all day, then basically realised eventually print mags were doomed and as a relative junior in that world I was going to end up not being able to find work down the line.
So got into marketing and digital stuff,none of which is ‘hard work’ in itself, but none of which makes me v happy either. Kept the writing going outside of the 9-5 for some of the mags I worked for previously etc.
Things have changed a bit for writers over the years though and now I’m finally at a point where I think next year I can just be a self-employed full time copywriter with tiny bits of website work/marketing for my wife’s business outside of that to keep things ticking over. So now I feel a bit like when people say they had kids early to ‘get it out of the way’ except with the not-so-fun jobs.
Like kik I’m not sure I’m a having-kids kind of person and neither is the mrs so earning more isn’t for that purpose at all. We’re just aiming to get to a point where we can both work for ourselves, remotely, and start living in other cities for a bit at a time.
So I guess all I mean is that if you get to do what you love all day that’s an awesome job. But if you don’t, then it should at least feel like a stepping stone to that happening, or like still-here said to fund stuff you do enjoy. That said I still have full beige-outs where everything seems pointless every so often. Human condition innit. It’s good you can be open about it too
Being happy at work is a very delicate rare thing. My favorite job was working at a pub but that was only fleeting. Having a good boss definitely helps but I find the boss is usually concentrating on furthering their career and if you cant aide that then your not in the picture.
hmmmm… i struggle with this a fair bit, i’ve done some TERRIBLE jobs in the past - and all things considered my job is pretty good - but i’m certainly not enthusiastic about it, and i’ve come to believe that i’m very going to be fulfilled in any job really, certainly not on my current career path. It’s the enormous amount of time that it takes up that i’m not comfortable with - nothing else gets done (well it does, but not any of the non essential stuff that is important to me, but not as essential to living )!!!
but some people find joy and security in status, or money, or actually end up doing something that they genuinely enjoy, or just ‘believe’ in the intrinsic value of hard work, or balance the sacrifice of work with what they get out of it, there’s nothing wrong with that - but we do seem to have a work system that is designed for those people, and if you can’t really get behind the concept of work then you can feel a bit liek you are just doing it wrong (even tho there are far far more of us (i think))
i think the trick is to find what is important to you and try and find a work solution that allows you to get some kind of balance, and moker is right, once you feel you are making choices evrerything is easier.
i could walk out of here right now if i wanted to
Yeah, think I agree with this. I’ve never really enjoyed a job, but the one I do now is by far the best, I don’t wake up with any dread or worry on Sundays. I’m capable of doing it, it has moments of satisfaction, I’m valued for it. I can’t imagine any job will make me a swivel-eyed champion of corporate values or whatever (and I’ve worked places where those people did exist), but it’s nice that a total grind can become a tolerable grind.
It’s called work for a reason
If you were meant to enjoy it it would be called super fun happy time
I’m all about the pay:bullshit ratio these days. It’s a philosophy that’s working for me.
think there’s a working class mentality to take any job within your grasp and plough on because you know people who have it worse and it’s an opportunity to not be on the breadline. i know very few people who have had the privilege of turning down jobs, and only know one person who genuinely likes their job and that’s because it revolves around having conversations with new people (which changes it up, day-to-day) and they thrive in that situation.
the dwp have declared me unfit to work over 16 hours p/w on multiple occasions. the nature of my disabilities means i dunno how i’m going to be day-to-day, and some days i am in too much pain or unable to do much more than wash, dress and feed myself, if that.
would desperately like to not be in a dead-end low-hour retail job, but no other low hour jobs are flexible or wouldn’t completely ruin me. plus, my wellbeing is not something i can count on, i’m unable to navigate professional spaces (disabled, thick accent, poor) despite being somewhat accomplished in the voluntary arts sector (been doing what i’m doing since i was 15, although any time doing that is time i can’t be doing paid work) and people have told me how good i am and to definitely apply for jobs but none of them ever suit my needs. my mam seems to think that disability legislation makes jobs more adaptable, but when i look at a job description it’s often just a big massive ‘no’ because they’re unrealistic.
Life is a series of closing doors, isn’t it?
My goal with work is to always find a job that was better than the last one. I started with horrendous work and have now through a series a moves reached something that is ok. I have accepted that I’ll never have a job that I love, but at least I don’t have to have a job that I hate.
I just wish that we weren’t all brainwashed as children with talk about finding satisfaction through a career. It’s perfectly ok to work just to finance yourself, and pour your energy and passions into other areas of your life.
It seems the general consensus is it is always going to be the job you hate the least, rather than the one you like the most. But at least if you get paid a reasonable amount (seemingly like anyone in IT) then it gives you options and piece of mind.
is that even that feasible if 35 - 40% of your waking time is pumped into working tho?