If you had to job share with one of the undead

what would you choose and how do you think it would go?

I think I’d pick a ghoul.

Can’t see it going well though, to be honest.

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On the plus side, a ghoul wouldn’t need an access lanyard to get into the building.

I’d pick vampire, if they took the night shift.

I think it would be mutually beneficial.

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Job share my current job? I’ll let someone else make the joke.

Oooo… my first thought was Freddy Krueger but I dunno, he might be a little stabby and it would get very hot there in that boiler room of his. It would be an excellent incentive to not fall asleep at my desk though. The banter would be excellent too.

Was that answer okay? Were you wanting something more general… like zombies n that? I hate zombies. You’d have to constantly move yourself around the room whilst they slowly tried to get to your brains.

I’d work with a zombie and open up an undertakers with him/her. Get the perspective of someone who’s already had their own funeral. It’d be a pretty unique selling point and if I can keep them from eating the customers I reckon we could make some decent coin.

Keith Richards


A werewolf. If I trained him carefully he could become a volatile reading dog to help the less confident children with reading

Used to be a financial adviser so I’d probably have to go with a vampire

When it wasn’t a full moon the wereperson could just help with tidying and stuff

Poltergeist, no awkward eye contact or small talk.

My colleague has chosen The Witch King of Angmar, I think that’s a solid choice. He’d take his duties seriously although he might consider some of the admin tasks beneath him.

There’s a strong chance that a lot of our other colleagues might end up being pierced by a Morgul blade though.

(Not that I know who The Witch King of Angmar is, of course. I’m not a fucking nerd).

what’s a job share?

literally sharing a job with someone? bit weird.

werewolves aren’t dead m74


I didn’t want to be the one to say this.

I don’t care

Yeah, a full time job split up.

Let’s say I’ll do Monday till Wednesday lunchtime and then the ghoul takes over for the rest of the week. We’ll do a handover on Wednesday and the ghoul can leave notes for me on Friday afternoon. Hopefully this will work ok.

I’m checking with HR to see if we can get a specially adapted keyboard for the ghoul’s clawed hands.

What sort of fucking attitude is this?

I’m not discriminating I’m picking the best creature/ghoul/goblin thing for the job. So I’d say it’s the right attitude m9!


Are you having a laugh?