If you were a dog… 🐶

who was competing in crufts, what competition do you think you’d do best in?

Best in show, flyball, agility, obedience etc??

Probably obedience for me tbh, I’m not proud of it but I do tend to do what I’m told.

I would fucking rule at obedience as well.

I would be worst at the doggy dancing (but that takes place at the Kennel Club’s annual dog show rather than Crufts)

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Which ones would you win?
  • Best in Show
  • Agility
  • Obedience
  • Flyball
  • Freestyle
  • Heelwork
  • Gamekeeper
  • Sexiest
  • Extraordinary Life of a Working Dog
  • Hero Support Dog
  • Rescue Dog Hero
  • Child’s Champion
  • Best Friends
  • Other

0 voters

I love the Flyball, seeing them all excitedly yelling away at the sidelines while their mates do their lap before they get their own turn :heart:

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That’s surprising to me, always had you down as a mover AND a groover

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My autobiography title sorted

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I have never grooved, I do move regularly but it is nearly always walking

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I’d make a great dog, just in general


I’d love to have you as my pet


Thanks very much

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I’d be best at Heelwork

Would just come out and say “crufts sucks, west minister kennel club dog show in New York is where the big dogs play” then I’d hit the fan favourite dog with a chair


I would love for you to be my pet dog, Shrewbs. Not in a weird way, I just reckon we’d really gel.

“Wanna go for a walk?”
“Yeah could do, up to you though.”
“I’m up for a walk tbh.”
“Yeah could go a walk.”
“Shall we get an ice cream en route?”
“Yeah that’d be nice. I’ve got some rice going in the rice cooker though so only a small cone.”
“Yeah that’s fair mate. Thanks again for doing that, really appreciate it.”
“No bother.”
“You’re a great dog.”


I’m not one to toot my own horn (steady), but I’d win the lot. Other dogs would sigh and groan when they saw me walk in cause they’d know the champ had arrived. Then one day I’d have enough of all the politics and bureaucracy of it all, bite a judge and run off never to be seen again.


Really loving this confidence tbh :smiley: and rightly so

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Got to have something you believe in yourself about, and I don’t have any as a human so dog me is gonna be a real arrogant prick, but in a good way.

I think you’re one of the most fantastic human beings that’s ever lived tbqfh.

But yes, dog you would be a real show stopper! Feel like you’d be a handsome Weimaraner

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It’s made my day to hear that at least two members of this community would like me to be their pet


Just looked this up and yes, that’s exactly what I had in mind.

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Running through the tunnel


As a breed, I find them a bit too handsome though? I don’t fancy dogs or anything but when I see them prancing around the park I’m like YES OKAY I GET IT, YOURE VERY BEAUTIFUL AND ALSO INTELLIGENT AND YOU HAVE LONG LEGS, SHUT UP.

Maybe it’s jealousy