Isle of wight

staying near ventnor this weekend

any advice?



Don’t go


There’s a big garlic farm. Do you like garlic?

Never been. Have fun!

not for me, clive.

OK so I just spent 5 minutes looking at a map to remember this so you basically have to do it.

Get yersel an OS map and get a lift/taxi to Brightstone. From there there is a really nice walk that goes all the way to Newport. At one point you can see the sea in 3 (maybe 4?) directions. On the approach to Newport you can go through Carisbrook Castle and have a look around. There’s a lovely tiny real ale pub in Newport that nikkers will probably know the name of. Get a scotch egg and a pint and then bus back to Ventnor. Takes all day.

think it’s called The Ale House or something

Let me just pop to the loo and that before I write the biggest post of all time.


Ventnor to Shanklin cliff walk is worth doing:

Plus Blackgang Chine natch. Plus, and call me old fashioned, I also like the donkey sanctuary…

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Pile 'o shite


…20 mins later:

either she had a very full bladder or the boards are about to be destroyed by the sheer weight of words


Could have needed a massive poo tbh tbf…

rushes in



Everything on the IoW is a bit of a faff without a car. Buses are expensive and infrequent and taxis are shit. So bear that in mind if you wanna go anywhere other than walking distance from where you’re staying and you don’t have a car. THAT SAID:

The best are on the south-west coast imho. Really empty wild shit going on here: Brook and Compton are the best. Anything on the east side of the island is super tourist centric with arcades and promenades and that (apart from Luccombe Bay which is near Lake, proper lovely there but you have to basically climb down some rocks to get there). Steephill Cove near Ventnor is nice, you can get crab sandwiches and that there.

So fucking many to mention. Most will do you really good food as well. My favourite is the Pointers in Newchurch. Goddards, Yates and Isle of Wight Brewery all brew local beers. You can also go to Godshill Cider Barn in Godshill (tourist hell but it’s very pretty, had good pubs and a model village) for local cider with rude names. You can get a good afternoon tea in Godshill too. Other favourite pubs: The Star Inn, Wroxall (really good veggie options); The Sun Inn, Hulverstone (don’t confuse this with the one in Calbourne); The New Inn, Shalfleet (good seafood); The Red Lion, Arreton.

Tennyson Down, obv. You can probably use Google for walks innit. 'm not really a walking person tbh.

Food shit.
Nomad. Think they’re either in Newport or Cowes. Delightful stuff. Also really rate The Garlic Farm. This is a good website for restuarant reviews:

Other shit.
West Wight Alpacas. Blackgang Chine. Crazy golf on one of the beaches on the east side of the island. Quite like Ventnor Botanical Gardens tbh, it’s free I think.



Some great things:

  • The long beachfront walk from Sandown to Shanklin…
  • …ending up at the massive minigolf course and brilliant old-fashioned arcade at Shanklin
  • In fact, it’s totally possible - and highly recommended - to do a minigolf tour of the island. There’s so many, and most of them are brilliant.
  • The road on the south-west of the island, called the Military Road. Very quiet during the day with amazing views and beaches, almost totally dark at night so ideal for stargazing
  • Ventnor’s started to get a modest scene going. The only real place to look for gigs etc.
  • The world’s best chip shop at Brading
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Military Road is my favourite road to cycle in the UK:

I’ve done this walk a couple of times before. Bit of a trek (maybe 12 miles?) but gorgeous views.

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There’s a photo of the path down to Brook beach with the knackered old boat by it hanging in our living room. Love that part of the island.

(Parents live in Freshwater so I know that bit well. Bloody hate the Pearl Factory, but it’s a good place to stop for a wee.)

I hear their tomatoes are superb.