Its my friday thursday thread

‘I do sometimes worry about leaving the computer on in case someone starts looking at dodgy sites on my PC. So I turn it off. That’s the extent of my security. (They could just turn it on again of course)’

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“Darling, why is there such much porn in your search history?”

“Dunno, must have been the plumber.”

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Colleague quotes thread pls

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Screenshot_20180329-113547_01

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Just replied to an email from a client that I thought was spam with ‘nah’. Turns out it wasn’t spam :sweat:

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Anyone got kids learning what Easter means at school?

My daughter was visited by a smattering of local parishioners (C of E school, the bellends) and they taught her (3 years old) of the cross, the rock, Jesus, the celebration and all that. The school sent through the photos of them minister talking to her and her making crosses out of lollypop sticks.

So she came home and I said “You learned the real meaning of Easter today didn’t you?”
“Yes” she said, “we had [redacted]'s mummy come and tell us”
“Right, that’s great! So what’s the real meaning of Easter then?” I asked.
She thought for a few moments, and said with the look of some serious thought and concentration “Chocolate and eggs”.
“Good job, yep, totally right” I said, smiling.

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One of my students emailed yesterday to say she was going to be absent from class because it was her daughter’s Easter parade at school.

I had to hold back a hilarious response referring
to the parade as, ‘Sectarian nonsense.’

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When travelling, does anyone else constantly check their tickets to make sure you’re not travelling on the wrong day / wrong destination etc? Since leaving the house this morning I think I’ve checked my tickets about 20 times :frowning:

  • Yes
  • No

0 voters

I used the same knife block I used to bludgeon a mouse to death to help me reach the water tap. Who knew a knife block had so many uses :sweat:

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Always

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Got so many hugs this morning that I wanted to sack off work. Would rather be in bed than be in here.

any LME wanna come to this with me tonight? (specifically looking at you @Ruffers)

https://www.shacklewellarms.com/events/2018-03-29-dancehall-single-launch-the-shacklewell-arms

I once booked return train tickets for four people returning a day later than I meant to and had to use my sweetest sweettalk to stop the inspector charging us £90 each to move them.

Doubt I’d get away with it now.

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My bro bought a plane ticket to the US for the wring month

I did this on the day we moved house. Crazy decision.

Trip to Ikea at 8am, trip to a furniture shop in Bromley, picking up the keys and moving other furniture all in one day.

Then when we’d finished at 7:30pm after returning the van, we had tickets to the local theatre that started at 8.

Ended up sleeping on a matrress on the floor when we got back.

The job interview I thought was on Friday was today so today is, indeed, my Friday. Went quite well so i treated myself to the J Dilla / Madlib collab album and (kind of appropriately) a doughnut on the way hooome

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I was planning to go to ikea tomorrow but it only just now dawned on me that it is the bank holiday :woman_facepalming: Going to have to wait until after the school holidays now, I was really looking forward to going :frowning:

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I’ve been raging about there not being any cake in the kitchen today then realised that it’s probably me that should have got some.

Still angry though.

How have you made such a mess of your meatballs?