Job Interview Chatecdotes

Got absolutely frazzled from head to toe on the beach immediately before getting my flight home from Primavera one year. Had previously set up a graduate interview for the next day as it was the only day we could both do.

Had been unemployed for months and was desperate for a job, so despite the fact that I was in agony, I lathered myself with 12 layers of aftersun, donned my suit and headed to the interview in Liverpool Street. It just happens to be about 30 degrees out and I’m absolutely dying.

When I arrive at the office for the interview they first tell me the air conditioning isn’t working and then that I’ll be interviewing for a different job than the graduate one I applied for – a regional manager position I was massively unqualified for. I am sweating through my suit. My entire body is on fire

Somehow I blagged this to make myself seem somewhat competent for the job and the two ladies interviewing me said I’d be invited back to meet the manager, who was out of the office. Relief! I get up to leave.

But just as I was about to walk out the door the manager walked past the office. One of the girls says she’ll just go and grab him. “I’ve really not got time for this Suzie”, he says in an audible huff as he reluctantly proceeds to enter the interview room.

He then proceeded to ask me every single fucking question again. But this time my veneer of competence was slipping. He also accused me of lying about my nationality saying I must be Portuguese (I don’t look Portuguese, and I don’t think the sunburn made it look so) which turned into a bit of a weird argument.

I ran home to bathe in calamine lotion. I did not get the job.

11 Likes

I don’t know why you Portuguese are so reluctant to be honest about your nationality.

19 Likes

This anecdote reads like you don’t have your most recent experience at the top of your CV. Unless he was reading the second page first?

1 Like

He was reading the second page first

2 Likes

“Did you not think to put your name on your CV?”

5 Likes

Pcbe

2 Likes

16 Likes

Yeah exactly! He must have thought that not only was I underqualified, but I was also shit at creating CVs.

Did you put your oldest jobs on the first page, or did he just start reading the second page?

This story is riddled with more inconsistencies than his CV

1 Like

I’ve clearly not made myself very clear and for that I apologise. He just started reading the second page.

PAGE 1

CONTACT DETAILS
PERSONAL SUMMARY
QUALIFICATIONS
BEGINNING OF EMPLOYMENT HISTORY

PAGE 2

EMPLOYMENT HISTORY CONTINUED (starting with the aforementioned Fancy Dress shop job)
HOBBIES
REFERENCES

so he only saw page 2.

Does that make more sense now?

Could you pinpoint where the fancy dress shop detail was please…

Dont you just have a massive photo of yourself on p1??

You’ve learned nothing from the apprentice.

2 Likes

I didn’t explicitly mention what my old jobs were, but during the reply phase of this thread added it since it was an example of one of my earlier jobs. I can see why this would be confusing though, and apologise.

This whole fucking anecdote is leakier than a sieve :rage::rage::rage:

1 Like

Wait, just reread the OP and I already mentioned the fancy dress shop job in there so this one particular problem is with you.

1 Like

Sure, sure…

180829%20Maosms%20CV

3 Likes

Well obviously this was a long time ago, and now my CV is just 24 pages of headshots in various guises and expressions.

2 Likes

And that it is a Résumé and not a CV.

1 Like

Haha imagine being a CEO and not knowing how to read a CV properly

1 Like