He refused to believe the Maitre’d was who he said he was so kept shouting ‘you cannot be Siriex!’
Resorting to ‘French names sound like English words’. Need to have a long bard think
Shakespeare when he has writer’s block
Yes! I’m back!
Was it because he’s been married for 27 years?
And here’s to 27 more
A bit like the time he got kicked out of a pub quiz for protesting at the answer to the identify the star round.
You cannot be Sirius!
I’d quite like to go on First Dates. I’d be an absolute train crash but the viewers on Gogglebox would find me adorable and I’d thenceforth be able to shag my way into the Malone family so i can correct them for being wrong about Twin Peaks and the UK’s nuclear arsenal
Who needs the uks nuclear arsenal when you can have a piece of manches’ nuclear arse
This is like when that guy entered the X Factor and straight-faced told the panel that his ambition was to leverage his appearance into ultimately becoming the president of the USA.
Set of pipes on him that joe biden
You don’t like French words that sound like English ones? Well, soirée!
Reminded me of the time Depeche Mode walked out of the dining room of their Paris hotel without having any breakfast because they had run out of eggs. As they were leaving Dave Gahan was heard to say:
“I just can’t get un oeuf”
Do you remember that episode of Top Gear shortly after Richard Hammond’s accident during which the Hamster had some slight trouble with sentence structure, and they had the famously bald frontman of Smashing Pumpkins and Zwan on the show testing out a state of the art Honda. However, when the alt rock icon was pulling off some sick turns, something very STRANGE and UNEXPECTED was observed to have occurred happening! His car vanished with nary a trace! Richard Hammond was the first to report this most bizarre of cosmic misadventures to the viewing public, as he proclaimed Billy car gone
Actually no that doesn’t work with the thread
it ACTUALLY reminds me of the time that Billy Corgan from off of the Smashing Pumpkins bought a present for Sir Lancelot and he’d written “to knight, to knight” on the gift tag so he had
He was frustrated at his date’s ability to commit to anything long-term and/or their propensity for making wisecracks when weighty subject matter was being discussed
Hey Mac, I’m shitfaced
I remember John McEnroe was on Celebrity Stars in Their Eyes having an absolute fucking breakdown backstage because one of his fellow contestants was mimicking an actor rather than a singer as contestants on that particular programme are wont to do. Matthew Kelly wasn’t jumping in because to be quite frank the man had enough on his fucking plate but John was absolutely losing his arse about it, he was shouting
YOU SHANNOT BE KEELEY HAWES
Does anyone else remember that time John McEnroe got mad at the tennis referee and shouted “You’ve gotta be joking” at him?