#394

Hey :slight_smile:

1 Like
#395

Hey @colon_closed_bracket :heart: Hope you’ve been having some lovely roasts with the family x

2 Likes
#396

All the Tory cunts on the news ‘the virus doesn’t know it’s Christmas’ just makes me think of bellowing out “LET THEM KNOW IT’S CHRISTMAS TIME!!”

Something about Geldof putting together a single this year to let the virus know it’s Christmas

1 Like
#397

Oh just thought of one.

Did you hear about the Kasabian gig where they didn’t blow the roof off?

They had Serge protection.

3 Likes
#398

Something about me and my partner having to give away a pet lizard because it was effecting our sex life with the punchline “a reptile dysfunction”

1 Like
#399

No need for the workshop, you’ve nailed it!

1 Like
#400

UK haddock fisherman called Ken has issues with EU. Haddock Ken/Hadouken, EU/Ryu

#401

Breakdancers are the loneliest of all dancers aren’t they?

Always going round on their own

#402

This film is rubbish its just women talking about lasagne

Something about it passing the bechamel test

6 Likes
#403
1 Like
#404

I don’t think I really need to workshop this joke, despite my girlfriend not finding it as funny as me, but I’m posting it here anyway as I couldn’t find a funny jokes thread.

Anyhow, she was in the kitchen and just asked me if we still had any shallots left.

I replied and said “Yes, we have shallots of them!”

It was particularly funny as we do actually have shallots of shallots in the cupboard.

1 Like
#405

Pistachio. Italian for taking the mickey.

#406

Oh, you’re looking to burn a witch? Make sure you pre-heat the coven!

8 Likes
#407

I guess this would normally go in our ‘annoying your partner’ thread :smiley:

1 Like
#408

Busta Rhymes celebrates translating his oeuvre into one of the Slavic languages

Woo hah! I got you all in Czech

4 Likes
#409

Muchos gracias to @hexagram for giving my joke its first like over a year later

#410

And now you’re like, Dej mi víc!

#411

Alexa have us this one tonight:

Q: Why do pirates find renovation tricky?

A: Because their timbers shiver and their planks keep walking.

#412

Sounds very AI generated.

#413

Are there any Taylor Swift songs which kind of allude to farting?

If so, then you can use it to make a joke where the punchline is “Taylor’s whiffed”