Jokes workshop

Two spiders are chatting on the phone.

One says to the other: “I’d love to chat longer, but I’ve gotta fly.”


Feels like there’s an update available to this, where it starts with something something web instead of phone.

Wait, I have to point out this is dreadful on here as well as on Facebook?



Two spiders are chatting on the web.

One says to the other: “I’d love to chat longer but I’ve gotta fly.”

NOW the potential of the joke had been increased.


Why is there no medicine in the jungle?



I’m trying to work on a very niche West Norfolk-specific covid-19 joke. Something like:

What’s the best car dealership to work for, if you want to retain your full salary during the covid-19 pandemic?

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I have a WWE joke on a similar theme that I’ve been nurturing.

How did Bray Wyatt’s company reduce costs during the pandemic?

Furlough the buzzards

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I had to Google that, but yes, it works

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Thanks for proofreading. I’ll drop it in the wrestling thread and give you 10% of the likes.

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Something involving Michelle Obama losing her job because of covid and getting baked

They furlough, we furhigh

Did you see the person with wooden shoes?


They were Inclognito


Something to do with a mix-up when a doctor who is having his bathroom repainted asks a decorator to provide a sample…

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Something timely about Pokémon and Ghislaine Maxwell’s arrest, something something G-Max…?

I just got dumped, and I think it was because I was a Liverpool fan.

As she was leaving she said “You never wore cologne!”


I was in a restaurant and I saw a door marked uni sex so I thought “yes please” and went inside. But all there was was a bleedin’ toilet

Something about velo-cal democracy?

Something like:

I grew up in the jungles of southern Asia. An unusual childhood but it had many advantages. I mean, I’m pretty good at identifying species of apes, but that’s a gibbon.

(I feel like I need to work on the length of the joke relative to the weight of its punchline).


It’s a bit008129_576x324_57070_120

I’ve never watched this show, but I don’t think you’re paying me a compliment. Thanks for the feedback nonetheless

Fuck it, I knew I shouldn’t have come back