Jokes workshop


Possibly, I dunno, the more I think about it the less feasible it seems as a workable gag


Just go simple

“I see Fabric’s reopening”
“Yeah I should really have double stitched”
(Assuming double stitching is a real sewing term)

“I see Fabric’s reopening”
“Yes you can see my cock and balls now”


Thanks but I think I’ve got it.

“You guys hear this news about Fabric reopening? That’s like the time where I bent over and split my pants and it was the second time it happened to this specific pair of pants after me repairing them after the first incident!”




Maybe use something about (Amy) Lamé and Fabric?


This is too highbrow for me, stick to it being about someone’s pants splitting and their bum showing please.


“No I said, organist! Uh huh huh huh huh!!!”


Apparently in heaven they just show Melancholia on repeat.

God loves a Von Trier

needs some work


@Antpocalypsenow a little help here please


Did you hear that St Paul recently changed the system to gain entry to heaven?
No, I didn’t
Yeah, apparently you have to sit through at least three films from the Dogme 95 movement
Wow, aren’t they really hard to watch with all the poor production values and difficult storylines though?
They are but God loves a Von Trier


this is definitely progress. Shame the joke only really makes sense written down so we won’t be able to pitch it to the Live At The Apollo people


You’ll have to start an improv/sketch troupe


I meant more that the Von Trier/Trier pun wouldn’t really work out loud


Fucksake man, this is like if you pitch for logo work and someone puts in the effort and then you say, “Nah, we’re a shit company anyway and don’t deserve a logo”.


or indeed at all, to be honest.


I think it can work very well as a written down joke theo. Different jokes for different…needs


Inspired by the Guardian subtopic:

“What do you think of minimalism?”
“Not much”

Improve it for me please hivemind.


did you know that the newcastle posters have formed a secret gang

it’s very Clan DiS Tyne


Think there’s the bones of a very good joke here:


MARLEN: What do you think of minimalism?
RUSTY: Not much