#40

Oh look! A joke I instantly regretted (regrat?)

#41

Mate, if you want to have some beef then go over and answer wrong on my end of the loaf poll in the Friday lunch thread like Mr. “just interesting think” Epimer over here.

#42

Also, you should have at least 2 likes on that post then. This is bad.

#43

You’re making assumptions all over the shop here.

#44

You are confused, that I will admit

4 Likes
#45

It’s bad and you know it. ONE like?! Man.

#46

It wasn’t me but I once saw a friend make a joke that was such a spectacular misfire his reaction will forever be etched in my memory.

New Year’s Day 2007, the basic thing was someone asked for a cigarette with ‘can I tax a rollie?’ The premise of his joke was to hear that as ‘text Rolly’ and so he said ‘I don’t know anyone called Rolly’ as soon as he said it you could see sheer panic wash over his face as he realised the scale of unfuniness of what he just said, and before anyone even said anything he started shouting ‘no! no! shut up!’ It’s the most embarrassed I’ve ever seen anyone. My house mate at the time was dying of laughter. More funny than a good joke ever could have been.

3 Likes
#47

What about accidental racism?

A few people in the office were talking about rappers. Someone piped up ‘My favourite rapper is a CHOCOLATE rapper’.

Instant look of wide-eyed horror on his face.

9 Likes
#48

Oh christ. So good and yet so awful.

#50

Not me, but once at school the headteacher covered one of our lessons and clearly couldn’t be arsed to do anything proper, so we just had a relaxed half hour. Then he asked a bunch of people to tell him their best joke. Everyone sensibly went for the least offensive joke in their (13 year old boys) repertoire, which were all very safe and unfunny. Then Tom Barry completely froze and went for:

Why did Princess Diana cross the road?
Because she wasn’t wearing a seatbelt.

audible inhalation through the room, so painful

3 Likes
#51

massive one just before Christmas: asked someone if they were coming to the office xmas dinner and they replied that they ‘didn’t really celebrate christmas’ in what I perceived to be quite a lighthearted way. so I’m like ‘LOL SCROOGE’ and he’s like ‘ah, no, i’m a Jehovas Witness’.

don’t think my face has been more red. maybe that time I tried to evacuate the floor at work when the fire alarm went to signal the start of a minutes silence on remembrance day, actually.

5 Likes
#52

years ago when a (gay) guy was joke-complaining about having to move desks so often I said “aw you’re like the littlest hobo” (referencing https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Littlest_Hobo) and he looked shocked and offended and I realised WAY TOO MUCH LATER that he’d misheard me.

8 Likes
#53

A friend very drunkenly at a party told/slurred a joke to 2 non drinking Scottish, half jewish attractive women about how copper wire was invented, 2 Scots fighting over a penny. When they didnt laugh they followed up with ’ you know there like the Jews got a reputation for being good with money’ It mortifies me to this day!

#54

Yeah, otherwise it’s a fucking brilliant joke!!!

1 Like
#55

Good joke, though.

2 Likes
#56

Well ok it wasn’t a massive joke or anything - but it was lighthearted banter.

God I hate you.

#57

This is no way for me to go into the weekend…

#58

You did this. YOU.

#59

did a really cringy australian accent to some australians in the queue for a club just before christmas too. was massively pissed, in my defence.

#60

Did you have a g’day though?