Yeah, I know that. That’s not the lie I was told. I was told if I specifically take ibuprofen, my stomach will bleed almost instantly so I am not allowed to take it.
Frank who lived over the back told me that the painted pole on the top of his shed was a beacon that he received signals on from alien spacecraft.
He had a printing press in his shed which he ran a small side business, his shed had a lovely printing ink smell.
Frank was the best.
‘Don’t pull your skin back too far - the end of your willy will drop out’
My mum always told me that toffee was made from a mixture of tea and coffee.
My dad told me when I was about 8 that Simon and Garfunkel didn’t record together any more because Garfunkel was dead. I believed that until I was 19.
This is a good one, just believable enough for the lie to last well into adulthood I’d imagine
tbh I didn’t drink coffee until a couple of years back, so yep
:D/D:
To stop me doing little things that were of minor, but negative, significance my Dad would tell me something disproportionately dreadful would happen.
Mainly done to amuse himself, but it’s made me a pretty fearful adult as a consequence.
Don’t eat sweets out of machines because you will get polio.
Don’t swallow chewing gum or it will wrap around your insides and screw you up.
If a rash spreads above your eyes you will die.
You need to go to university so you can get a good job
This isn’t the “lies Tony Blair told your parents” thread!
why not
Sorry, it can be if you want.
Definitely weapons of mass destruction hidden in Iraq
Basically this:
a builder out the front of my house told me i was going to die because i swallowed a piece of cellotape. proper shit me up at the time, the fuckin horrible cunt.
My Dad’s pretty old, like 82, so he has black and white photos of him doing national service when he was a young lad. When I was a nipper he used to tell me that he fought in World War II and that one time he was up a tree when two Nazis walked underneath him, so he shot them both in the head killing them. I told anyone who’d listen at primary school that my dad killed two Nazis. Was only years later when I gave it a bit of thought that I realised he was 5 years old at the outbreak of World War II.
my parents didn’t go in for this sort of thing very much, but my mum told us that she was 21 and that mums are 21 every year. i didn’t believe her but my brother did and mentioned it to teachers at school (it might have been her birthday or something). this would have been when she was in her mid-40s
My aunt told me there were little bunnies inside peanuts and for a few years I thought there really were rabbits trapped inside nuts
