There is none better than jobby which is amusingly used in Aberdeenshire and City as a “small oddjob, like fixing a picture frame”.
dipstick
plonker (that’s an all timer)
Tube or plantpot both get a decent amount of usage when I can’t fully express myself.
Plantpot’s an absolutely belting polite putdown. Use it a lot, along with balloon, spanner and notright.
Prong.
Notright is absolutely marvellous. Having that.
gutted that my daughter grew out of picture books before this was published
https://www.waterstones.com/book/poo-bum/stephanie-blake/9781877467974
Derrhead
Mah TV’s a Scot, and “tube” always makes me grin
Duurbrain
Probably, yeah
Berk, on the other hand, is more than fine.
Also quite like using wally when talking to the kids in my class too.
Fuck, yes.
not sure if this extends anywhere else in the country, but a ‘Malcolm’ refers to a jobsworthy little shite in the Guildford/Woking/Aldershot tri-city area. one of my faves for sure.
Its berk. Berk berk berk.
Fanny
Borderline adult.
I call things “spoons” all the time. Ya fucking spoon.
Get a lot of mileage from using words off of American cartoon type stuff - bozo, dunderhead, dufus, etc.