Lying: The Poll Thread

  • I once had to show Gareth Southgate where the toilet was at Hampden.
  • I once shit myself while driving from Troon to Glasgow
  • I once called Ewan MacGregor a bawbag when meeting him at the premiere of his animated movie Valiant.

0 voters

  • I got drunk with a friend one time and went on the roof of the Houses of Parliament
  • I pulled a weapon on a mean boy at church when I was 9 and got into loads of trouble for it
  • I wrote a musical about myself when I was 14, complete with toe-tapping numbers about contraception and my personal desirability

0 voters

I don’t think any of these are lies.



Actually, these are all true

  • Daniel Beddingfield played me Gotta Get Thru this before it was released
  • I’ve bought guitar accessories and albums from the lead singer of semi-popular Scottish band Meursault
  • I’ve had a drink with Barry from The Futureheads

0 voters

One of them is a lie but only because I changed a fundamental detail of it to not be true.

1 Like
  • An ex of mine was in national newspapers for a minor scandal
  • I once danced on stage with the Flaming Lips dressed as a bear
  • Michael Eavis once called me a ‘good man’ and gave me a tenner when I carried some furniture I’d just sold him to his car.

0 voters

I bet Eavis isn’t that polite.

When are we all revealing (save it for Thursday etc)?

  • I helped Timmy Mallet learn how to water ski
  • I over enthusiastically approached Nicola Roberts after a Girls Aloud gig shouting “you’re a Girl Aloud!” and she ran off scared
  • I called Tim Wheeler ‘Tiny Tiny Tim Wheeler’

0 voters

  • I once told Alex McLeish that he looked just like Alex McLeish
  • As a waiter in an American themed diner, I once dropped a large ice cream sundae on lomano lua lua’s daughter
  • I got ruud gullit and Alan shearer’s autographs in Luton Airport but my mum put my trousers through the wash with the piece of paper still in my pocket

0 voters

Reckon it was Kazenga.

The restaurant was in Colchester, obviously

1 Like

Could have been visiting.

Ok I’ll try one

  • I played Eiffel 65’s blue on piano as my GCSE music performance piece
  • My music was featured on a Mexican Skype advert
  • I won a marshmallow eating competition at my mate’s 30th because I have a massive gob

0 voters

The lie was…

My uncle is best friends with John Hartson, the footballer who used to play for Arsenal!

Well done most people! He was a close friend of my English teacher in school, and she got each of us a signed photograph from him.

Both of my brothers went to Cambridge, was in the local newspaper and everything, here’s me visiting one of them for the Trinity May Ball as a 16-year-old.

I was a big Insane Clown Posse fan as a teenager, long before most people knew they existed. I am not anymore.


I’ve never eaten sushi

Sorry food people

This is wonderful

I have eaten 63 1/2 McNuggets in a sitting, and I have eaten 50 cocktail sausage rolls in a sitting.

Never had 24 profiteroles in one go, but have probably done 10-12.

Congrats @kermitwormit and @ma0sm, the only ones to get both answers right. You creeps x


You’ll always be my savoury man xx