#58

:hugs:

1 Like
#59
1 Like
#60

Please leave me alone, I just want to play Candy Crush and go home and have a burrito

1 Like
#61

Have to say NV, if this is the worst rhyme you can come up with you have lived a charmed life.

#62

cc @anon5266188

#63

I’m confused. The rhyme in the OP is brilliant.

2 Likes
#64

how has it got to 63 posts and no one has pointed out that Noah thinks Express Yourself is called Respect Yourself

3 Likes
#65

Still better than that greensleeves abomination on the new album innit

#66

Belle and Sebastian - Funny Little Frog

‘You are my girl, and you don’t even know it
I am livin out the life of a poet
I am the jester in the ancient court
You’re the funny little frog in my throat’ (pronounced like throw-it)

1 Like
#67

incorrect.

when he changes the delivery to ‘never be heav-en with-out you’ at like 2:27 says you’re wrong.

Also that aside, reading the lyrics it’s like comparing Pablo Neruda to William McGonagall

#68
1 Like
#69

I love the Beastie Boys, but come on, Pass The Mic:

Everybody’s Rapping Like It’s A Commercial
Actin’ Like Life Is A Big Commercial

Makes me crack up every time (which may very well be the point, but still)

#70

I think I just really like weird, force rhymes.

One of my favourite Dylan lyrics:
“Born in Red Hook, Brooklyn in the year of ah-who-knows-when,
Opened up his eyes, to the toon of an accordion!”

1 Like
#71

slip like freudian,
your first and last step to playing yourself like accordion

^belongs in a best rhymes thread, obviously

1 Like
#72

Remember me God, clean timbs with emery board
He only came to save the game like a memory card

perfectly dates it to 2003 like a Dreamcast Arsenal shirt

1 Like
#73

Got more lyrics than the church got 'ooh Lord’s
And he hold the mix and your attention like two swords
Or even one with two blades on it
Hey you! Don’t touch the mic like it’s AIDS on it

1 Like
#74

Tom Whyman For President by Parcel Force

let’s set a precedent
Tom Whyman for president
it would be excellent
so make me president

When I watching the much missed mathpop band Colour for the first time they also rhymed precedent with president, so I text him to let him know. Pretty sure his reply was “Excellent”

#75

Oh good, no-one’s done Robbie Williams’ Rudebox yet. Honestly think you could have done a thread about bad lyrics in this song alone. Contenders:

Sing a song of semtex
Pocket full of Durex
Body full of Mandrax
Are we gonna have sex (yes)
Do you wear your knee socks (ohh)

or

OK then, back to spaceship
Take both pills, f.uck the Matrix
Jack those Jills, shake your Playtex
Rock three stripes, not the Asics
A-D-I-D-A-S old school, 'cause it’s the best
(Yes)
TK Maxx cost less
(Yes)
Jackson looks a mess
(Bless)

or (and I think this one is my favourite, possibly favourite of all time)

OK then, what to do
If you try to jack me I’ll rudebox you
If you rudebox me I’ll rudebox your whole crew
’Cause it’s what I do
Ain’t that right boo (true)

3 Likes
#76

:smiley: reminds me of this (not much rhyming, mind)

This is “T” to the mother fucking “Ofty”
What’s your problem Dickhead

[1st Verse]

Don’t kick my dog dickhead
Don’t beep at me dickhead
Why d’you mug me off in my car dickhead
Why you disrespecting my bra dickhead
Theres a dickhead in you’re mouth
A dickhead on parade
Do not have kids
Don’t want dickheads to be made dickhead
Why you disrespecting my bra dickhead
Why d’you piss me off in first class dickhead
I’m not sitting here to be treated like a dickhead
Bumba Clart, kin’ Raas Clart
Where’s the Chorus dickhead

[Chorus]

Isn’t it Lovely, that we can still be good friends
They say you’ve gone off me, don’t be so sloppy…baby
Isn’t it Lovely, that we can still be good friends
I know you still want me, cos I’m so lovely…baby

[2nd Verse]

If you diss me you’ll sell copy dickhead
What d’you expect dickhead
Radiohead dickhead
This is pop dickhead
Size tens dickhead
break you’re shins dickhead
My security are a viscious crew
They’ll kick fuck out of you
Only if I ask them to, but
They’ll kick fuck out of you
You’re going home in a Stafordshire Ambulance

I wasn’t looking at ya’ bird dickhead
She was looking at me dickhead
Who do I think I am dickhead
Who the fuck are you dickhead
You must have me confused
With someone who gives a shit
I’ve found the dickhead of the year
And you are fucking it dickhead

Where’s the chorus…no chorus… dickhead

[Chorus 2]

Isn’t it Lovely, that we can still be good friends
They say you’ve gone off me, don’t be so sloppy…baby
Isn’t it Lovely, that we can still be good friends
I know you still want me, cos I’m so lovely…baby

[The Tofty Rap]

I’ve got a bucket of shit Ohh Yeah
I’ve got a bucket of shit
I’ve got a bucket of shit Ohh Yeah
I’ve got a bucket of shit
Not, horse shit, cow shit dog shit no real shit
I’ve got a bucket of shit Ohh Yeah
I’ve got a bucket of shit
Not, horse shit, cow shit dog shit no REAAL shit!

[3rd Verse]

Why d’you cut me up in my car dickhead
Why d’you say bad things 'bout my bra dickhead
I’ve got nothing for you dickhead
Go to bed dickhead
Don’t wake up dickhead
Who gives a fuck dickhead
No one gives a fuck about you cos you’re a dickhead true
See your mate over there in the corner he’s a dickhead too like you, dickhead

[Chorus 3]

Isn’t it Lovely, that we can still be good friends
They say you’ve gone off me, don’t be so sloppy…baby
Isn’t it Lovely, that we can still be good friends
I know you still want me, cos I’m so lovely…baby

Dickhead

1 Like
#78

*BNGR

1 Like