My friend puked right outside my backdoor the other week



we were getting pissed and high, playing fifa and what have you and he was really going for it, booze wise.

he nailed 3, yes 3 bottles of wine, a quarter bottle of rum and shared 4 heavy spliffs in the space of a few hours.

one minute he was ok - the next…he did this bubble mouth noise thing, legged it out the back door and puked on the fence. right outside the door.

told him I’d let this one slide, as i’m not a jerk, but next time this happened, I’d assume he was just being a disrespectful cunt and would probably just smack him in the chops.

thing is - the toilet is the same distance as the place where he puked. his decision to puke outside puzzled me, I can tell ya.

took me about 30 minutes cleaning it up the next day - in the BOILING SUN and hungover to fuck. lumpy as fuck, wasn’t it. YUK!

another thing is…and here is the kicker. he didn’t even acknowledge it the next day when we played tennis. made some comment about going hard that night, but nowt about the pile of sick. WEIRD

this ain’t golf, man



top, top lad


I knew this was going to be a @bird thread.


Not much more you can do when there’s vomit on the fence


You’ve given me a good idea for a thread @bird


sounds like a sick night!


Not up for that mate, would rather clean up someone’s shit than someone’s vom.

Had a similar thing back in the day with a mate who threw up in the kitchen sink when the toilet was adjacent and available. Very puzzling.


Think I’m alright with the outside vs. toilet decision. Much bigger margin for error by heading outside.


It’s tennis.


If he was that shitfaced he probably didn’t remember the puking. Blessed amnesia.


he was fine after being sick, man. we got right back onto the fifa, then played some UFC. he also carried on drinking

true pro, this guy


He’s gone down in my estimations.


This seems an unusual stance. I mean, no-one wants to do either, but shit over vom?


Yeah man, I mean I hope I’m never tested on that but in my limited experience of both I hate other people’s vom more than other people’s turds.


agree with this 100%. worked in care for a while, so dealt with many, many turds. easy


Horses for courses, as they say.


Who says that?


The French/Findus.


he was panicked and went outside, it doesn’t seem unreasonable, but he didn’t apologise or clean up after himself and that is unreasonable.


man! there is a tap right outside the back door, say two feet from the vom. I turned this on that night and left it running quite fast for a few minutes, just to try and make a dent in it, before dealing with it properly the next day

cunt said I was wasting water! no shit. made me fucking mad.

he also said I should sweep it up, but I told him to bring his own brush for that. cheeky cunt