**New** Mental Health Thread (2018)


#2267

Christmas party was last night but sadly my anxiety got the better of me. Dressing up is always a big problem for me, my weird body shape makes it so difficult to get anything that fits, and I always look off in some way or other. Felt like I was on the verge of a panic attack from the moment I started getting dressed, to the moment I left the party early having spent four torturous hours trying to interact with people, hating myself and feeling so deeply unattractive and gross.

Feeling pretty crappy this morning too but a bit better. Just desperately wish I could let myself go and enjoy myself like a normal person.


#2268

Some days, I feel like I almost have a semblance of a functional human being, and then days like today where I can’t trust myself to run a tap. Today is entirely in the latter camp.


#2269

how’s everyone coping with the shorter days?

has been shit for the last 6 weeks or so

to get back to the amount of light i feel is good for me, that’s… 10 weeks from now :pensive:


#2270

I’m starting to feel very isolated. I wouldn’t be surprised if almost everyone I know up here just expects me to be sad and doesn’t bother chatting to me because of that.


#2271

idk I guess I have been invited to a thing next week with lots of nice people.

I just feel very lonely day to day. people don’t really talk to me very much anymore.

not that they did. more that a specific few people hardly talk anymore. the people who were closest to me.
.


#2272

Obviously we can all be very different people in our private lives than we are in other aspects however I can’t help but think you are being hyper-critical of yourself here as this just does not sound like you. I hope you work things out and don’t become a stranger as you are so important to a lot of people on here - but at the same time you should absolutely take whatever action you need if you feel like this place isn’t helping with some aspects of your life. Loads of love x


#2273

Vitamin d high strength mate. If i miss two days of my vitd in winter I feel like shit.
Here’s a cheery thought though- a week on Friday is the shortest day of the year and after that, day by day, sunset gets a few minutes later and sunrise a few minutes earlier, and by the time we’re into January, you’re practically downhill skiing into spring x


#2274

Good news here is you’re second guessing your default thoughts mate. You wouldn’t be doing that if you deep down thought you had no value at all.

On the other hand, that doesn’t necessarily make your mental state work the way you’d want it to. Really pulling for you here and hope you can find some stability soon xxx


#2275

sorry about that, really struggle with the idea that i look off to people too, even sometimes not in a physical way, just like people know i’m weird by looking at me or interacting with me or something.

i know it doesn;t help that much to hear it from random fellas on the internet, but you’re looking sharp with the beard, pal. really suits.


#2276

:fist:

dunno if youre working during the daytime but if you fancy going for a walk or a bike ride or some bollocks give us a shout (would say a beer but trying to avoid that\being in town generally). sad lad chat is like my specialist subject.

totally understand if not x


#2277

this would actually be mint, y’know. I’d love to go cycling somewhere? feels like it’s about time we hung out and all. maybe we could take beers with us and drink them outdoors, eh x

oh wait you’re avoiding beer. beer isn’t essential, it’s fine to not have beer.


#2278

thank you colin xxx

a few people have come through unexpectedly

like, obvs trickles ^ which sounds ace and nice

then a friend from my old job said I could come hang in Oswestry and go to a lake and adventure and stuff

and the other week, DiS top lad @desertshore popped up on whatsapp and we chatted a bunch and I should plan to go hang with him in the new year

also one of those close friends I was down about just invited me into town for a beer. “get a bus in. we’ll have a beer. like old times”. which :heart: .

aaand I’m going to a cool arty poetry thing with @deadonthestairs and possibly some of our mutual friends tomorrow

I keep expecting people to be distancing themselves. I guess my self-worth is still shaky.


#2279

could sneak a few cans in. it’s the being out in front of people/strangers drinking that’s been fucking with me. just send us a message one day (when it’s not pissing down ideally) and I’ll ride down to yours, or meet anywhere really.


#2280

yeah, defs! I’ll have a look at the weather and think about where would be nice to cycle. :smiley:


#2281

Probably doesnt count for much but you’re one of my favourite posters here and I always look forward to seeing what you say


#2282

i understand this, definitely a few friends who have sort of drifted away from me at some point, or some who go through phases of being less available for a while. in reality i know they just have busy lives and all that but in the wrong mood i can’t help but take it personally and think people just don’t like me. get worried that i’m hassling them by sending them messages that they don’t respond to.


#2283

it really does mean a lot, even if it’s still hard to get my head around the thought of anyone enjoying my presence anywhere! or because of that, perhaps.


#2284

yeah, it’s hard not to, isn’t it?

with one of these friends, it’s especially hard because he explicitly stepped back from me temporarily a few months back - he’d been dealing with some stuff himself, and it seemed he couldn’t cope with the aspect of our friendship where you are someone for your friend to open up to about sad stuff, at least for a bit.

he didn’t articulate his reasons especially well, but we did talk a bit a few weeks back and he said for the first time that he’d figured he’d been suffering from social anxiety himself, which is surprising, given that he’s befriended maybe thousands of people over the years (at least met over a thousand people well and accumulated them on Fb, anyway).

but yeah… I think the main thing that had me worried was that some of our mutual friends used to be closer to him, but then ended up not being, and I worried I was being moved on from as a close friend.


#2285

Of course! We will really have to get ourselves to get a drink and watch a game soon too


#2286

I used to find this really hard to deal with, it’s absolutely absurd that the clocks go back in November but for some unknown reason we have to abide by it (apparently the whole reason for it was so that farmers wouldn’t get tired in the war, or something).

I work in an underground basement type environment where there aren’t many windows, so I don’t really notice it. Last couple of years I started work in the afternoon and always woke up late every day so I really noticed it. Now I have a full time job I have to wake up really early but my days feel ‘fuller’ and I’m generally happier (a lot of my mental health problems have just vanished by getting a job, being surrounded by people and having a strict structure in my life).