**New** Mental Health Thread (2018)


#221

Tw: suicide

Hey, hope everyone is doing ok. Scott hutchinsons death has really hit me - opened up a lot of wounds for me re my brother’s suicide. Completely complicit in failing to get him help when he needed it. Feel myself entering a bit of a spiral of self loathing. Not really sure why im posting this tbh but i feel i need to get it off my chest. Sorry.


#222

No apologies required Warny. Had no idea you’d been through that yourself - sorry to hear it’s reopened some old wounds - hope you manage to work through it again before too long and it doesn’t get too bad. We’re always here if you need mate. You’re a good guy. x


#223

Sending you all of the love. I can’t even begin to imagine. X


#224

I loved our brunches. I hate being so far away from you and chintzy etc. I would come to a weekend with women of dis (or even a night away if that’s easier to organise- probably easier for me tbh with leaving the wee one). Let’s do a separate thread next week. People as fabulous as the folk on here should not be lonely x


#225

Same TW: suicide

I had a similar reaction - my cousin took his own life almost exactly 5 years ago and hearing about Scott’s death hit me pretty hard even though I didn’t know the guy or his work all that well. My cousin was 36 too, oddly. He was like a big brother to me - I spent most of my childhood following him around trying to be like him. I’ve always blamed myself for not doing enough to help him. I spoke to him on the day it happened and he was saying things that in hindsight really should have set alarm bells ringing. And when he was at his lowest there were times when I just couldn’t cope with dealing with him. Whatever anyone says I know in my heart I should have done more. And that’s not something you really ever get over.

I’ve not got any advice or helpful words or anything. Just wanted to say I know how you must be feeling and it’s fucking awful.


#226

So sorry to hear you’re going through something similar. X


#227

I wish I had something more helpful to say, but if any of you ever need to talk you can message me and I will listen. I think this thread is amazing and I think it’s definitely the right thing to talk about these issues. Sorry I’m not much help but one day at a time is all any of us can do.


#228

opened up to my dad earlier about what I’ve been going through, and he told me to lose weight (literally). had to just say I was tired and was going to bed.

I wasn’t even sad about that, despite my weight being the result of 5 years of anti-depressants, but just feel even worse now.

:frowning:


#229

hey, employ me and we’ll hang out and look after each other


#230

ah that’s tough and I know that feeling very well :frowning:


#231

Hope you’re ok

Just remember men can be stupid fools offering daft advice at times when they’re uncomfortable.
I’ve done it myself several times and regretted it. I’m sure he’s kicking himself for his reaction


#232

just pretty upset because he’s always been an arm round my shoulder. no idea why he’s suddenly come out with that half a decade after I’ve put on a tonne of weight due to pills I take to treat GAD, which he knew about the whole way through.

argh, people say stupid shit sometimes, but I just feel pretty upset.


#233

aye, I’ve done it a fair few times myself, I’m sure. I trust him, so I sort of just wanted to end up having a laugh with him about the football etc to cheer myself up, but blehhh.


#234

Im totally shite at stuff like this, but here goes.

Coming from one pintman to another, doesn’t really matter does it. The amount of times my grandparents have called me fat to my face is beyond a joke, but it’s family and it is supposedly coming from a loving place. Bollocks. It hurts and the fact that people hold you to previous version of yourself sucks.

You’re a top, top bloke and whilst things like that are hard to hear, we have to remember that there is no maliciousness to it and there are other factors at play that others may not realise.

Love you man x


#235

cheers man. it just really came out the blue for him.

I’ll be fine tomorrow, I’m sure. I get my saying stupid shit at the wrong moment genes from him I guess :slight_smile:


#236

Nah, it’s what men do, as safebruv said. We can’t help ourselves


#237

thanks lads @safebruv @rich-t @Severed799


#238

Sorry @profk, it’s alarming how pig-headed and insensitive people can be, even when they’re family and are generally decent people.

My grandparents were cruel about my weight when I was younger, and (contrary to popular belief) being belitted and bullied over your weight only serves to make things worse. I think you’ve just got to try and remember that nobody is perfect and I’m sure your dad would be gutted if he knew you were upset about what he said.

There’s a long, LONG way to go with fat acceptance and TV & film probably make it quite easy to be influenced into thinking that weight is the be all and end all when it comes to happiness.

Don’t let it get you down :fist:


#239

I feel dreadful today. A minor domestic escalated up to where my anger is just unbearable. Then I had a meltdown.
I don’t know what to do about my anger problem cause I get so frustrated and I feel just a huge urge to just get that anger out of my body by smashing something (I didn’t this time thankfully).
I think I’m just quite an anxious and angry person atm but I have no reason to be! I have frustration outlets but it’s not enough in the heat of the moment. I can’t bring myself to remove myself from it when it feels too much. Any ideas? Podcasts? Online courses?


#240

Absolutely understand where you’re coming from here. If we have an argument it tends to escalate to the point where I find myself having to almost physically restrain myself from punching something or throwing something at the wall. I’m pretty laid back in many ways but in others I overreact and get stressed easily. I’ve found recently that if something is said that makes me feel the anger rising up or building up I have to leave the room, find a corner or quiet spot by myself for a minute and count to 50. I’ve tried online stuff but none of it seems work as well as finding my/one’s own personal method. I think it’s a very personal, individual thing how it’s triggered and manifests itself. Sounds a bit lame but have you tried just leaving the house for a walk when it happens? This is another one I use, my wife now knows that if I’m doing it, it’s for anger management reasons rather than storming out of the row. I’ve gone on a bit here but hope that might help, sorry to hear you’re feeling so bad.