Not the ducks I know

There’s a sign up at the park I go to sometimes apparently representing the opinions of ducks residing in the pond saying “we don’t like bread - please feed us something else”, and then there are pictures of foods such as lettuce and seed below it.

Well that’s not true of the ducks I know. Whenever I’ve fed a duck bread they’ve loved it.


How is this not a Theo thread?


One of the best parts of my childhood, lobbing a massive full loaf onto the side of a duck pond and watching the mallards, geese and bantams have a battle royale.

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I saw some geese yesterday down by the canal

Swimming all politely in a cute little line

Then they a-spied a single slice of bread

Went wild man bastard haywire

Never seen a duck eating a salad.

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Our ducks fucking love lettuce. Get through a couple a day. Usually tie one to a branch with string so they can peck at it, and roll another one out like a bowling ball and they chase it round. Bread’s not great for birds to eat tbh.


From the way most duck I’ve eaten tastes you’d think they ate nothing but Chinese food

Yeah that’s the thing, innit. Bread is like junk food to ducks. It’s not like they don’t like it, I love eating junk food, it’s just that it’s bad for them.

Reckon the sign should say “Hi, I’m a duck, please don’t feed me bread as it’s not a nutritious part of a balanced diet.”

I’m partial to a sandwich but should eat more peas and salad tbqh

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