Now for my next thread I’m going to need a volunteer from the audience






Hello, and your name is?




that was an uncomfortable 22 minutes


It’s my speciality.


The beautiful saps! Now saps I just need you to, real quickly, just look through this pack of playing cards and confirm to the audience that they are, in fact, just an ordinary deck of playing cards…


Man, that saps is thorough.


And this is his “real quick” version. Ain’t no tricks getting past him.


You don’t get to his position in the force without an obsessive attention to detail


I paid £94 for these tickets


That’s what you get from buying from viagogo. The face value on mine is only a fiver.


Sorry guys… just back from the loo. What did I miss?


was saps in the stall next to you? Is he still?


I think I saw him propping up the bar on my way back


Can’t believe @jordan_229 actually made @saps disappear. Bravo! What a trick!


From a cursory examination they appear to be an entirely normal deck of cards.


On closer inspection, these are loafers.


that’s where you are wrong! it is actually a gimmicked set of cards:

Thank you! Thank you! applause


No one makes me look a twat in front of an audience.

I’ll be waiting for you in the car park.