OFFICIAL Hungry Hungry Hippos BattleThread!

As requested by @Epimer in today’s Daily thread.

He has made the tactical error of mashing his hippo before any of the balls have been released.

How do YOU respond?

I was checking the mechanism worked before the stakes get high, obviously.

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I choose the purple hippo, Henrietta.

i think i’ll prob start mashing my hippo now thanks colin

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looks on in disgust

Just gonna mash the hippo and let the fates decide

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how long do you reckon itll be before that post is in the out of context thread?

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I’m surprised it’s not already there.

sighs and mashes Henrietta

I am very, very, very subtly tilting the playing arena towards me

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NOW MASHING FOR MY LIFE

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I’m gonna try and psych everyone out by demanding a reading of the rules before the balls are released.

WHATS THAT HORSE? I CANT HEAR YOU OVER ALL THE MASHING!

fuck! Hippo jam! Hippo jam! Dislocated jaw!!! PAUSE EVERYONE

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I DEMAND TO KNOW WHETHER THIS PRE-GAME MASHING IS LEGAL OR NOT

points at the hippos, points at ear, shakes head mouthing “I can’t hear” in an exaggerated way

Guys, can you keep it down, I’m trying to read

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FINE! LET IT BE KNOWN THAT I REFUSE TO PARTICIPATE IN THIS FARCE. THIS IS A DARK, DARK DAY IN THE LONG AND STORIED HISTORY OF HUNGRY, HUNGRY HIPPOS.

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Have I won yet?

Hmmm maybe this wasn’t the best choice for the Quiet Coach in retrospect. Can’t stop now though.

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