Ongoing battles with inanimate objects

I’ve found that I am having more of these of late.

Key one is my battle to get all of the washing up on the drainer of an evening. Last night I got quite angry with a wine glass that wouldn’t behave itself. Needless to say, I had the last laugh.

Hetty hoover and its willingness to stay in the cupboard

Every day my keys stick in the locks and I have to struggle to get the door open. Every fucking day.

plus my bedroom door which after 9 functioning years (since I moved into the flat) has decided it will no longer close - meaning it’s impossible to keep naughty cats out or safely get dressed when the kids are around

until last year I lived in a flat which required 4 keys to get in and they all had a ‘knack’ so getting in was just a series of battles.

You smashed it into pieces in anger?


The lock on the bike hangar in our street.

I can’t work out whether I’m doing it wrong, or whether you do need so much strength to turn the handle, and whether it needs to be so loud when it clicks into place.

my wardrobe has started hitting my elbow every time I get dressed :expressionless:

My biggest issue with AirBnB (aside from all the moral ones, obvs, I just mean biggest practical issues) is that nearly every one I’ve used has had at least one lock with a knack, so for a few terrifying minutes you’re convinced that you’re locked out and because the owner lives nowhere close, you’re fucked if you can’t get in.


For a while our upstairs neighbour airbnb’d their flat and we’d come home to panicked people on our exterior doorstep looking at all the keys in a confused manner.

Once in Gdansk we couldn’t get in and had to wander round until we found a cafe with wifi and email the owner (who was in Thailand!) who after a couple of hours told us that you had to do something weird with the deadbolt.

Give me a fucking Travelodge any day.

1 Like

my shower is a prick

That’s funny, because my pri-


Mine takes about a minute to sort itself out and get the correct temperature. It goes
Correct temp - Warm - Scalding - Warm - Freezing - Scalding - Correct temp

mine has decided that warm water is no longer an option, just scolding or freezing from now on. and it’ll flit between the two, the wanker

shower of bastards

Having ongoing problems with my toaster which sheds crumbs everywhere whenever it’s used. Found a mouse hiding behind it a few months back :confused:

Trafalgar Square, 11 am today!!!1