Online dating



See I never got any dick pics. Just the insults. Maybe they dish out these things on a rota?

(Although tbh if I got a dick pic I would be more than tempted to find some more examples off google to send back. Help build their collection)


You could probably get a roll of those number tickets like at the butchers. Keeps everyone orderly.


Yeah I was tempted to do that too!

Also had a lot of requests from fetishists. :flushed:

I wonder if the insults came from what you put in your profile, did you have words like politics or feminism - which would provoke a certain ‘type of people’?


Try and always include a question/ follow up question in your messages to keep the convo moving

If they don’t do the same then just give up - people who just answer the questions you ask them and don’t ask you anything back are the worst

I tend to move to asking for a date pretty quickly - endless online chat is pointless really


I tried several different versions of my profile. It wasn’t outright insults, more those sly negs.

I’m clearly a magnet for insecure losers who’ve read a pick up artist guide.

Tbh I just gave up on the whole idea of dating. If meeting standards like “is capable of being nice on a first date” is so hard then . .


Quick (anonymous) poll for the gentlemen of DiS:

Have you ever sent a dick pic to anyone other than your TV (e.g. a friend or someone you’re flirting with but not actually going out with)?

  • Yes, unsolicited
  • Yes, solicited
  • No

0 voters


Option 4: never sent a dick pic to anyone, even the TV


I don’t know what kind of result they’re expecting too. Are they expecting something like “wow that’s a magnificent beast” rather than the more likely response of “oh there it is”


“Doesn’t it look like a face?”


My first serious gf sent me a tit pic via MSN messenger before we started going out. In many ways she was a real pioneer.


I’ve never received one but if I ever get one then I’m sending a pic of Dick Cheney back.




Reply puzzled “what is it?” and stand firm on the statement that “oh, they don’t normally look like that”



I go through phases with tinder, always downloading and then deleting it. Had some really nice conversations but never met up with anyone- like other people have said, I think I’m a lot funnier/come across better in person. All my photos are just of my big stupid face, so inevitably a few guys have said “oh, so you’re really fat then?” And it’s a bit like errr… does it matter? Dunno really, my friend met her boyfriend on there and they’ve been sickeningly happy for a year now, other girl friends have pretty much just had people be well rude. Like @_Em said, lots of creepy neggy comments and they’re always surprised when you call them out.
Probably not for me though, I’m too awkward and say silly things in blind panic. All I want is someone who’s really funny and passionately loves day time tv as much as me, and statistically he’s definitely out there


I’m always tentpted to reply ‘but how do I know it’s yours and not one off the internet’ then make them pose with a copy of their passport and today’s newspaper.


I am newly single, but realise that when I want to jump back on the horse, so to speak, I will have to get on the apps. Thing is, I hate writing about myself and find myself becoming incredibly judgemental of people based on their descriptions or their photos. When I look back through my previous flings/relationships, I’m not sure I would have engaged with them on an app, so you do worry about you’re missing out on. Also, never really warmed to gay hookup culture as I’m over-cautious and over-analytical.


It’s weird like they see you as an enemy to be defeated or something.

That’s not how relationships work!


Yeah that’s exactly it! Why are you being weirdly passively aggressive to me, pal?
It’s the openers like “I hope you’re not one of those awful feminist/socialist/vegan etc types” oh get in the bin would you