ordering a Coffee in a coffee shop

it’s a right pisser, these days. these days, they put you in jail if you just order a coffee.

is it just me being a fake middle classer but i find ordering a coffee annoying at shops. like, just this morning i ordered a coffee (“thanks, yeah a white coffee”) and they asked if i wanted a flat white.

i don’t know what a flat white is.

so i said “no, just a white coffee?” and they replied “okay, ill make you an americano and give you milk”

uh, ok.

is it just me?

chat allowed


I think it’s fine to have a list of different coffees but if I was working and someone said “white coffee please” I’d use artistic license/common sense and just make an americano/grab a filter coffee and add a dash of milk


Alright the person it that McDonalds advert, Larry David etc.


THESE days

yes i would like to be in a mcdonalds advert

I do get how if you’re not into coffee it’s annoying, and confusing. But also, if you apply that to tea and just went in and said I’ll have a tea then they will be like yeah which one we have loads.


yeah i guess im not really reading the menu, i just want “a coffee” which i guess is just a bit too simplistic.


Look at the menu and pick something

Ordering a white coffee in a coffee shop is like going into maccys and going “burger please”


Id have them locked up and thrown in jail


is it as bad as that?

i asked once, what a flat white was (i had a month old and wasn’t as online as i am now, believe it or not) and they couldn’t accurately tell me the difference between it and a few other coffees, not really. i guess this place wasn’t a real coffee place.

Flat white please. Thanks.


Cant wait for the milk in coffees is for babies crowd to arrive


What’s the deal with coffee?


Flat white is a bit of a weird one, so I’d just ignore that to be honest.

But yeah I think it is as bad a that…or going in and just saying I’ll have a beer at a bar

Conversely hospitality staff work in difficult and poorly paid conditions and I don’t think it’s unreasonable to ask for clarification to avoid difficult situations.

Eg a bunch of times I’ve said “with oat milk” and the place has been noisy or I’ve been wearing a mask and they’ve come back with “without milk??” which is obvs ridiculous in most circumstances but… y’know. Get it right, everyone is happy.


I think if you’re in a coffee shop that specialises in doing different espresso based drinks it’s the same kind of thing.

Most places can’t tell you what a flat white is because they don’t make it in a distinguishably different way from a latte.

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that’s the thing i even googled it and couldnt figure it out haha

Flat white please. Fini.

However when I buy a coffee for my Mum she likes a white coffee, and I tend to say an Americano with hot milk and it’s fine.

This is of no help. I wish you well on your coffee quest.


No idea what “white coffee” means. You’ve fucked it

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