Perv Island 2018 🌴🍆

If you’re upset that Love Island is over, fear not! Perv Island starts tomorrow evening at 5.45pm. The series will last for 3 days.

The villa is a bungalow in Bedfordshire with a hot tub. No-one will get dumped from it (probably) but there may be voting to determine the winner.

Our contestants:
A has a partner, so no recoupling for them
B probably won’t get to couple up, but could be spicy if they did
C is very keen to couple up and has their eye on a number of the other contestants. They are a proper sort. (Potentially the Megan of the series)
D is absolute flames so should by all rights be coupled up, or in with a chance of coupling, but none of the contestants is their type on paper. The Alexandra of the series (luckily, without an Alex)
E is tenuously coupled up with C. But will they get to remain in the Do Bits Society if C mugs them off?
F has expressed an interest in joining the DBS with C, with is kinda mutual, but will have to put in a lot of graft to secure a spot in the Hideaway.

But one more boy is entering the bungalow as a late addition…
X has really turned C’s head (again). But are they looking to couple up?

Tune in tomorrow night for the recoupling.

[Pleeeease can this be fine to post, I’ve been looking forward to making this thread for the last week]

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:clap::clap::clap:

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I’m already hooked

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There will be a Casa Amor episode.

pics

Is C going to stay loyal to E?

Okay so one of the contestants is @xylo?

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oh my word this is tremendous

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C and E are have had a chat about the fact that they want to get to know other people, which is fine for both of them, but C definitely has more options than E. (E - and F, actually - think D is flames, but D isn’t feeling it.)

E and B have previously coupled up and joined the DBS, but in a friendship couple. C slightly mugged B off by coupling up with E (although it was a long time after E and B had finished their coupling). If C pies E off, could E and B recouple again? Find out in tomorrow’s episode.

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C is definitely the most likely to do an Adam (“ah’d be layen if ah said ah didn’t fahnd him attractive”), X most likely to do an Alex-esque U-turn on their feelings without anyone else being a motivating factor. A and D are very loyal (babes).

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Absoltuely no idea why aggpass doesn’t want to come to tournaments when he could be a part of these tasteful shenanigans.

ftfy

It’s alright for you, you’re officially coupled up!

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acceptable uses for hot tubs (as described by the Hot Tubbers International Association)

  • sitting and reading a book
  • sitting and having a chat
  • sitting and enjoying a refreshing beverage
  • playing with a small boat or submarine
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THERE’S A POLAR BEAR ON THE ISLAND???

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I went through a phase of hilariously referring to sex as ‘tubbing’, so ‘hot tubbers’ is taking on an extremely different meaning for me here. @xylo would you consider yourself to be a hot tubber?

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pray tell. I hope this is contrived

My dad (who also uses many hilarious euphemisms, which is why i have such a creative way with words) once used the word in front of me and I found it extremely funny, so used it for a bit as a bantsy term. ‘tubster’ for penis too

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carnal relations in or around the hot tub:

  • no. impractical, tasteless and potentially a safety hazard
  • yes.

0 voters