Quinoa

You spelt that wrong.

Turns out I love bulgar wheat. But only how they do it at the turkish place

you don’t even like tabbouleh?

not even!

Don’t really ‘like’ many salads tbh.

When O go in Italian restaurants my brain always wants to say things the Spanish way, which is wrong sometimes

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I RLY?

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Cho-ri-tho

easy.

yeah, me and my dad embarassed the shit out of the rest of my family when we were in italy a few years ago, thinking we’d be able to order stuff / ask for directions in Spanish without any problem.

when it turned out that no one understood us, we kept doing it but threw in more italian hand gestures and used italian accents, which actually worked a bit better.

had a member of staff in a morrisons once absolutely piss himself at me for asking if they had pine nuts. he was sure I must mean peanuts. he kept saying back to me: Pine? Nuts? in true Garlic Bread? fashion.

Well there was your first mistake.

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similar thing when I tried to order a Lamb Karahi over the phone years ago.

"and one Lamb Karahi please’
“lamb curry, which curry?”
“no, Karahi”
“yes, curry, but which one?”
“KARAHI”
“curry?!”

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they had them! i watched from a distance as he explained to his manager what was going on, could see his mouth grappling laughingly around the words “Pine? Nuts?” and gesturing towards me. The other guy showed him where they were and we all had a jolly good laugh about it

Also once when I was working in a supermarket someone asked me where the FAJ-it-as were. What? You know mate, the old el paso FAJitas.

See I get to be a snob on both sides of the counter!

My gf’s best friend’s boyfriend pronounces it that way. He also asked for his chicken FAJitas to come without onions or peppers or anything.

So just chicken in a wrap then? Alright chief.

beefstake

GET HIM

He’s had a couple of other absolute clangers, but I can’t remember specifics so this post is completely pointless and I might not even bother finis

Did you consider the Four Candles trick of saying , “Nuts from pine”?

I’ll do it if the person is obviously Spanish. won’t otherwise.

going out for tapas in this country shouldn’t be done anyway, of course.

I considered it before realising I don’t know what you’re on about