Read Receipts


#1

Why do so many things have read receipts on them these days? Why have they become so normalised?

Can’t turn them off on Facebook Messenger, it’s not an option.

Such a pain in the arse when someone gets annoyed because you didn’t reply to something. They should not have thatuch insight into whether I looked at it or not.

Sometimes it says I’ve read something that I haven’t too. Like if I’ve left my computer on at work or something.

Always some cunt moaning that I’m ignoring them. I’ve had enough.


#2

I’m considering opening a supermarket called red receipts and our USP will be in the colouring of our receipts. I mean TKMIXXXX may have done it already but are they a supermarket? No.


#3

Unred Receipts would be more accurate, though? And then you can just keep your receipts white and not even have to put the effort in.


#4

If this is your pitch to partner me you have just fucked it big style!


#5

I’m considering opening a bakery called bread receipts and our USP will be in the bready nature of our receipts with the words toasted on by hand. I mean no-ones done this because it seems really inefficient and stupid, but fuck 'em.


#6

Or it could be unbread receipts and have receipts made out of paper. Eh, Theo?


#7

It could, yeah.


#8

Best thing about having a burner phone.


#9

if you get a receipt from the end of the roll, it can be all red


#10

It usually just has a red stripe doesn’t it?


#11

only if you’ve bought some of that fine jamaican beer


#12

Might open a shop called Tread Receipts, the USP will be that you get your receipt stamped out on a bit of rubber


#13

Thinking of opening a shop called Thread Receipts, the USP will be that the items on the receipt have been stitched onto it.


#14

Might open a shop called Treat Receipts, the USP will be that it sells delicious fattening food but someone gives you a dead leg as you leave.


#15

On FB messenger and WhatsApp I hope the person has made a concise and articulate message so I can read it, or get the gist of it, without having to open it and activate the fucking read receipt.