Reasons You Might Be On The Naughty List This Year

What have you done on Xmas Eve that would make Santa put you on the bad list?

I farted in Wor Lass’s car after delivering The Child but left the windows up so that will probably still be there on Tuesday when she drives it next.

I think I’m getting coal this year.

1 Like

Got done for speeding

Ran through a farmer’s meadow (is this still funny?)


Just used the last clean “good” bowl for my cereal, leaving 'er indoors with a “shit bowl”. As I’m typing this she’s said “you left me the shit bowl?!” in an outraged tone, so I think I’m going to double down and call her “MC Shit Bowl” for the rest of the day.


I do love a modern re-telling of the nativity.


Are you too sophisticated for, “You should see the state of the toilet…”?

1 Like

I didn’t donate to captain Tom


I’m actually withdrawing my original entry (wayhey!) because I’ll be the one driving to nursery tonight so I’ll be smelling my own methane.

I’ve just wrapped her presents and I think I’m genuinely going to have to pretend The Child helped me with them. Who knew folding paper around some flat/ cuboid objects would be so difficult?

I went on a ten minute rant about why Captain Tom shouldn’t be necessary last night.

Yeah the guy’s in a zimmer frame. Probably could barely hold a gun. And we’ve got loads of drones and shit nowadays


Oh I said some very bad things to my brother…

He deserved it though!

1 Like