#50

Oh god this.

I’ve started to lie about this at weddings now, it’s just not worth the hassle.

At a wedding last weekend the guy to my right said “you don’t to justify it, but why are you vegetarian?” to which I just replied (a bit rudely, tbh) “I’d rather not mate, cheers”.

Then the woman to my left picked up on it and told me that if I was going to be vegetarian I had to have a reason. I told her I didn’t. She told me I did. Fucking cunt.

1 Like
#51

Not wishing to defend your weirdo hippy diet, but you should’ve grilled her on her reasons for eating meat

1 Like
#52

yeah this is the absolute worst

#53

Bloody veggies can never shut up about the fact they are vegetarian… oh wait

3 Likes
#54

someone asked me this recently in work actually. thing is, shes only been here a few months and if anything id recently trimmed it so it was a bit shorter than it was when she started. she was like, did you not have a beard when i was in training? i said, i didnt have a beard about 10 years ago

#55

I just say ‘why do you?’ and leave it at that. If they persevere I’ll crack them over the head with a stick of celery

1 Like
#56

always amazes me that people think that you’d want to answer this

#57

all sorts of questions about my weight

fuck off please

#58

!! what?

#59

“have you lost weight?”

“how much have you lost?”

it leads to comments about what they thought i looked like before, which is just not what i want to hear thanks

#60

when friends ask how much you earn.

none of your fucking business mate.

#61

Can I have that work I asked you to do last week?

#62

yeah i have a friend whos muslim and her parents are from bangladesh and people are always asking her where shes from, when she says manchester they go no where are you originally from. and shes like M A N C H E S T E R

2 Likes
#63

None of your business, fuck yourself very much!

#64

when people say “can i try them on” and you say “no im using them”

i find doesnt give a particularly good hit rate

#65

Just tell them you’ve actually gained weight.

If they claim you used to be bigger try to convince them that they were just a bit nearer to you that time.

1 Like
#66

Had a haircut today. It was the classic questions asking about holidays, working today? any plans for the weekend? Weather’s nice innit? With a good 2-3 minutes awkward silence inbetween. Either be one of those really chatty barbers who goes off on one or pipe down.

#67

Lost a fight with a lawnmower?

1 Like
#68

It amazes me that people still get upset when you demonstrate that the only way you can answer that question is by implicitly criticising their life choices.

Like, what did they expect?

“God, vegetarians are so holier-than-thou!”

Really? You did just badger me into telling you why I’ve chosen not to to follow your lifestyle…

#69

proper 90’s gag this. love it

feel free to like me back man

1 Like