No need for that mate, just cause I’m going a bit grey

Found a grey hair yesterday about the length of my arm, devastating.

It was Corbyn I believe

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Fuck off

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Maybe the marketing bods at John Lewis tried really hard this year to win it all over though. “They may hate commerce, schmaltz and conformity but… they do like Pixar.”

“IN THEORY”

Yes, ok, I cried.

(I am the monster though. I snore, I fart and I am not called Bridget the Fidget for nothing)

Next year it’s going to be fully bolted on to the Marvel universe, I’m telling you. And you’re gonna watch it and you’re gonna know you could have stopped it from happening. Best go out and get a saucepan set from them this year.

I’d have gone with Desk the Not-Statuesque.

Because I’m a bellend.

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Only liking for the second part, obviously.

The first part would be lucky to get a pity-like from Theo.

(side note, I originally wrote ‘looky’ instead of ‘lucky’. Bellend.)

Nah, I thought last year’s was great - but I’m a sucker for woodland animals.

Didn’t like this one at all, but at least the music wasn’t awful - just bland and unnecessary.

Yep, sounds like Elbow to me.

(sorry s’punky)

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Elbow sound more like Elbow than any other band. If you’re looking for that “Elbow” sound then call in Elbow I say.