Secret Agent Thread

What you up to currently?

I’m mostly collecting from dead letter boxes and doing the odd hand to hand exchange on park benches.

Doing my commute on various modes of transport, purely to confuse myself

just speaking nonsense phrases to people as i pass

‘the bassoon is on the clock’

Careful, you’ll end up being cast in The Mighty Boosh reboot.

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oh no

Stashing a bunch of passports and some cash in a storage locker.

Carrying a LOT of passports under various names and nationalities.

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Who’s your passport guy, they any good?

Keep telling the gf that my work trips are actually a cover for a second life and the all the evidence - ticket stubs, tram timetables etc - are elaborately constructed evidence to hide my tracks.

This way when I actually go away on secret agent business she won’t suspect a thing.

hoohoo, you’re good.

Berlin Frank. He’s good enough and I trust him.

Might have to kill him.


Sticking to the Moscow Rules at the minute.

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Waiting for a message telling me I’m activated followed by a photograph of my target.


Shit. Just accidentally fired a sleep dart from my pen.


I’m sleeping with a nuclear scientist called Lucy Panter.


Wearing a trenchcoat and dark glasses.

Using a secret spy pen


Assessing customers, sightlines and escape routes in Starbucks.

I know where the bodies are buried…

If anyone else is looking for one, these are expensive but very good:

Just off to Russia to help a defector escape the country through a tube