Sexual innuendo or not?

Honestly, there has never been a greater player on banked oval or ferry fiasco than this man typing right now. I know it can be intimidating to be in the presence of greatness but I have fought hard to retain humble.

(might look at that later).

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“As the actress said to the bishop”

  • Never really understood this one tbh
  • I dunno

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“I didn’t realise it was a blow job”*

  • My devoutly Christian uncle has offered me the use of his pocket handkerchief. Upon learning that it I intend to use it for snot, he retracts his offer.
  • Someone’s dick is about to be sucked.

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*based on true events

I think this one is exclusively reserved by the posh and wannabe-posh

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Any chance you could x?

  • Chris you filthy bastard
  • Chaste Budgie would never dare

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oh my god

Four player, waiting for the sponge, knocking each other into the sink, someone makes a break round the outer edge of the sink, others pull back to blow them up, small boys, jumpers for goalposts.


Let this wash over your eardrums

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Lady froth

  • A dainty amount of froth, shaped like a uterus, on top of a cappuccino
  • Female sexual fluids

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Nice baps

  • I am being complimented on having taken M&S’ finest burger buns with me to the BBQ
  • Norks

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Not an innuendo but: nork clinic

  • A clinic for TITTAYYYYYS
  • A clinic situated on the road of Nork Gardens in Banstead

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“Chum on me milkers”

  • Providing a chum or friend for a group of cows and informing the cows that no payment is required
  • Spaffing on some tits

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‘in or around’ :joy:

  • image
  • What? It’s just a percentage.

0 voters


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What’s the deal with your colour scheme, m9?

Mate, all the cool kids are doing it:

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I think this might accentuate the ‘I’m clearly not doing work’ ness of my DiS usage to the onlooking colleague.

edit: but it is good