Simon Mayo?

Hugh Fearnley-Whittingstall?

Sorry not enough space on the hard drive

3 Likes

Ruby Wax?

No I’ve just had them syringed

2 Likes

Roald Dahl?

Sorry mate, I’m allergic to pulses

4 Likes

Dawn French?

Oui

5 Likes

Dostoevsky?

More of a snowboarder

5 Likes

Thomas Pynchon?

He should keep his hands to himself, frankly

2 Likes

Ross Noble?

Just a humble peasant milord!

2 Likes

Morrissey?

Sorry I wasn’t looking

Also I’m a racist cunt

9 Likes

Irvine Welsh?

Ah thoat that c*nt wis fae Edinburgh

2 Likes

Hugh Grant?

No I paid for it all myself

2 Likes

(basically just looking at my bookshelves RN)

don’t forget to buy a copy of Transformer signed by me, Morrissey

1 Like

Hugo Weaving?

Crocheting actually

2 Likes

Robin Cook?

Nah let’s go out

1 Like

Joan Armatrading!

Sorry arma not buying

3 Likes

Paul Sinha?

No I have lived a virtuous and chaste life

1 Like

Stephen Hawking?

No, the contents of my suitcase are not for sale

2 Likes

Pete Postlethwaite!

I’thwaited long enough!

1 Like

Danny DeVito?

No, I agree with this particular motion

4 Likes

Ian Rush?

Yes! Get out of my way!

4 Likes