Smooooooooooth Operator



I got really drunk at fucked up last week. I’d enjoyed the support act and bought their cd at the merch stand in the interval. During the main act I found myself standing next to the 3 girls from the support. I thought I’d acknowledge them and express how much I’d enjoyed their set but in a non-creepy way (not that easy when you’re a 40+ yo man).

So I took their CD out of my pocket and turned to the nearest (singer, guitarist), pointed at the CD and yelled “THAT’S YOU!” (note : not a question). She smiled and nodded nervously/politely. Then I dropped the CD and spent a few moments retrieving it. When I stood up again they had moved away slightly, presumably to improve their view?

Eat your heart out Clooney.

Anyone else been charming as fuck lately?


Think it’s about time you grew up really pal


That’s hurtful.

Maybe accurate.

But hurtful.


I thought sexybum was just a persona?!?!?!?!


Tough love is still love.


tbf trying to chat up / impress someone in a band is like playing on hard mode. you will never be as cool as them.

unless they’re in a shit band I guess


Funniest part of this is someone buying a CD in 2016


Probably won’t play it, they’re on streaming services but it seemed like a good way of supporting the band to be honest.

My hope was for semi-amusing tales of cack-handedness but dull snark is fine too.


It’s ok I still buy CD’s too


You owe me a tale.


I met the guitarist from fucked up outside the 100 club a few months back, and insulted his uncle


Hey! You’re the old the sleaze ball here, don’t make us (me) feel bad


Just looked up the tour- if it’s the band I’m thinking of who I vaguely know, they’re all like 18-19, so no wonder you scared them off!


You might’ve missed this yesterday, it wasn’t chatting up but it was an “attrative” moment (and I feel I also owe you a tale):

“Hi I’m Jenny”
“Hi, I’m J… I nearly said I’m Jenny too but that wouldn’t have made any sense”


Oh who is it?


Got a name related to body image- sisters.


Sounds feasible. I hope they interpreted it as praise.


They’re nice girls- you’re probably just a scary middle aged man.

About three years ago my (female) housemate took some promo photos of them not realising they were all about 15-16, and then offered to go to the pub for drinks after and they turned it down. When she found out their real age she felt bad about it, like she was trying to lure underage kids.


They make more money of tshirts


are you Jenny too? that would have made sense