Someone asked me once if I have a foot fetish. I said “no but I have a thing for footwear”

“I have a shoe horn”

It’s a play on words around the word ‘horn’.

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bless you horn

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Are shoe horns still a thing? Feels like something that belongs to a distant era like ivory handled back scratchers.

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A boy hit me with a shoehorn with a face drawn on it in marker pen in school once. I was like wtf why did you just smack the back of my neck really hard with some solid object, and he showed me the shoehorn with a face on it (he’s named it but I forget the name now) and expected me to find it really funny and forgive him for hitting me. Which tbf I did, it was pretty funny.

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Dunno, was watching a video of mark weins in Japan. They had them there

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The boy with the horn in his shoe
Behind the hatred there grew
A murderous desire, for loooove

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I’m horny
Shoe horny horny horny

My mum carries one to help her get her shoes on without bending down as much.

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All the time?

It’s only about 20 or 25cm long so fits in her handbag

What else is in it?

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A shoe horn.

You can’t fit a shoehorn in a shoehorn, don’t be silly.

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Very clever joke, this. You deserve your place in that poll.

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Almost bought some shoes with a built in shoe horn the other day which would have been handy. (This brand but probably not these exact shoes, and that’s not my hand)