Spreading your ashes

You can donate your whole body you know.
They can leave you out somewhere to decompose and then it helps them learn how long people have been dead for or how long it takes for vultures to peck you gone.

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I didn’t think to suggest mixing him into a bunker.

Might mix him into a bunker!


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The People’s Pyramid for (a portion) of me:


Oh yeah that was on the criminal podcast. Dunno if there’s one over here. Would leave all decisions up to my next of kin. Funeral is for them not me, they can do what they want, I’m dead anyway


I’ve always said to the TV that I want to be cremated as soon as possible after death - no carrying me into the crematorium in a box to be sent through the curtains on that conveyor belt thing. Then just scatter me around the Lake District - Langdales is fine.

My understanding is that medical science frequently declines the kind offer of people’s bodies. So then you’re back to square one.

Me and Mrs F made wills last month so this did come up. I opted for cremation on a whim and she left her options open. When the time comes I don’t gaff where my ashes go, on the compost heap would be fine. I remember a few years back when my granddad died my dad wanted to throw his ashes in the river in Norwich for some reason, so we all went down there on a chilly winter morning, but we didn’t do it because for some reason god knows. So bear that in mind: once your rellies have got over your death, then your funeral, they’d probably not appreciate having to jump through yet another hoop to toss your dust in the wind on some inaccessible hilltop.

Mix my ashes with a big bag of chalk and divide it up between my friends so I can help them climb.

OR throw them in the face of my mortal enemy.

Not really, put them in the bin for all I care. I’ll be dead. If it’s important to family/friends to scatter them somewhere, then I trust them to choose somewhere nice.

(sorry if this is insensitive to anyone - not intended)

Also when you donate your body to medical science relatives get the ashes eventually so still can think about where you want them to go

what a conversation to have with yr mam

i remember scattering my grandad at a spot where he liked to go fishing. either my grandad or my uncle

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My dad got in touch with the council to ask if he could scatter his mum’s ashes over a local beauty spot. They said no as it’s technically fly tipping. He has done it anyway, albeit late in the evening when no one else was around to see

I saw an interview with David Seaman once about this very topic. He said, “Just lob me on the goal line.”

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I would like my ashes frozen until a time where science has evolved to be able to create a kind of superpower ash man.


SOme in cubicle 1 at the toilets at work, rest on the sofa at home

This gives me a good idea.

I would like my ashes to be thrown in the face of someone feeding bread to ducklings on St James’s Park lake. This is my last will and testament.


my friend is in this :slight_smile:

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Me and my mates always say “spread my ashes on the penalty spot at the stretford end” at the start of any long drinking session

Bit daft but what we all want I think

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Off the end of the pier and into the sea for me I think. Can’t be any worse than any of the other rubbish that’s floating in the sea at Brighton