Supermarket items you check before buying

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Always squeeze the bread for sponginess.

My wife likes bananas that are just the yellow side of green, I like them when they’re just the yellow side of brown. My banana intake depends on hers, really.

Mixed peppers - I’m happy to take small green, yellow or orange ones as long as the red one is biggest in the pack.


This is why we need MORE plastic

stop touching all the food.


This is a good one. Strictly no more than one green twat. If there’s a green-free pack I will fight over it.

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Why buy mixed? Red is king the others get gtfo


Nah, I like the variety (even green). Besides the c*nts charge a fortune pepper by pepper.

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ctrl + f avocados - 0 results


I’m forever squeezing avocados.


My local greengrocers cut one open and have it on display, so you can squidge the ones you want and get a good idea of the creaminess / insides from the sacrificed one too. Three for a quid too if they look a bit ropey.

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We use Ocado, this week we got two lots of broccoli, one absolutely massive, one literally half the size, even though they both reckoned they were 350g on the label. Would never have happened if I were picking them out myself.


This is one of my major supermarket irks that its like 60p for an individual pepper, but a quid for 3. Even though I’m never going to use the green one, I’ll obviously buy the 3 pack. Does nothing but encourage food waste.


Curries, pizza, stir fry, Mexican food… loss of uses for green peppers.


I am aware of their uses, I don’t like them though.

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These football songs are getting too middle class these days


Vaguely remember an ad on Irish telly for sliced pan that revolved around a blind fella going shopping and squeezing loaves of bread then accidentally squeezing the shop assistant’s bum or something? Was very weird


I check bags of spuds to make sure I get lots of big ones, jacket potato sized and up. CBA peeling the little ones, don’t like them with skins on.