I was at a wedding yesterday, there was a guy there who must have been about 16. Half of the happy couple is Scottish, so it was a full kilts and suits job but our hero had decided that cargo shorts, top knot and grey T shirt reading “I HATE PEOPLE” was the way to go, and no-one was going to tell HIM different.
I was about as rule-following as it comes, but tell me about your embarrassing acts of teenage rebellion.
I used to wear the pixies Frank Black t shirt where it looks like he’s holding his kn*b to school.
I changed the address on my council library card to “Bowels of Hell”. The librarian wasn’t happy the first time I used it and I had to cross it out in front of her.
Used to smoke doobies down the bottom of the garden while listening to angry rock music on my Walkman. Then I’d eat an entire Sara Lee Gateaux straight out of the box with a spoon and hide the evidence in the Wendy House.
You can probably gauge how much of a rebel I was from the fact that when I decided to get my hair cut really short, I went for a grade 2, rather than getting a grade 1 which would’ve involved being barred from school until it grew back.
My brother went on the business card printing machine down the Leisure Centre and got a load of cards printed saying “Join the Satanic War”. They had his phone number and a picture of a goat on them. He planned to hand them out to any Jehovah’s Witnesses that came round
Oh me oh my forgot that me and my mate carried out a satanic ritual aged 13 in the breaktime of ‘do drop inn’ drama club.
Teens are the fucking pits eh.
Teenagers flirting with Satanism because of Motely Crue is a rich seam.
I was an inverse rebel, I got into art, studied and had no social life. My mum was the one who smoked, drank and did drugs as a teenager. Absolute hooligan.
Wrote “skin up” all over my maths book cover. Then when the teacher asked about it, claimed it said Inupsk over and over, which I said was a place in Russia I really wanted to visit.
Lots of pretend devil worship too, once made a pentagram out of the remains of a KFC bucket
There was a girl in my year who used to scrawl “Bob Geldof was here” over other peoples exercise books. One of my mates was obsessed with drawing Roadrunner on things as well.
Just remembered accidentally sending a text to my step-dad instead of my BFF when we were going to bunk off college for the afternoon to go into town and get drunk and stoned.
The text started ‘I’ve already skinned up’ but my dear step-dad was so clueless because he was such a straight laced, rule following teenager that he thought it meant I’d started drinking already
Hahaha that reminds me of when my grandad asked me at family dinner if I was going out for a couple of sherbets later. He meant beer, I thought he meant coke and almost choked on my tea
I was really quiet and mostly very polite as a teenager, albeit with a sense of humour that was less so (hence my legendary story about sitting next to someone on the hours long coach trip to Germany in year 8, with the journey starting off with him bullying me for being a nerd etc and then ended with us being good friends for the rest of secondary school)
One attempt at humour that backfired was the complaint email I sent to the school IT technician for adding Tetris to the web filters blocked list, which started off like a formal complaint and got progressively weirder before ending with details about summoning demon apes
Was put in internal exclusion for a couple of days and all the teachers who were asked to provide work were really confused, “What the hell did he do?”
once tippexed the lyrics to an Elliott Smith song on a black t-shirt
There was the one and only time I got a detention at school. We used to have double science on a Friday afternoon and we’d all get a bit daft and excitable. One week we wanted to see how many “bench” related activities we could invent. One mate went “bench surfing”. I went “bench caving” and crawled around under the bench amongst all the coats and bags. I don’t think the teacher saw any of that as the detention was for talking.