Terrible rental opportunities (rolling)

Not the same as the weird houses thread, this is just for listings on SpareRoom, Gumtree etc which give you hives from either the landlord’s desperate attempts to create living space out of shite, frankly bizarre furnishing decisions for a rental (I’m getting rage issues from how many of the big bedrooms on SpareRoom are over-furnished with huge unnecessary armchairs that ruin a perfectly good amount of space), or passive aggressive listings.

Inspired by this nightmare from the landlord thread:

But also this listing - only one photo of the property (helpful); the second photo is a delightfully passive aggressive reminder to call rather than message (backed up by the description). It’s not like you’d want to know what the property looks like or anything!

If you really love this sort of thing and haven’t come across Joel Golby’s London Rental Opportunity of the Week series, you’re in for a treat! They can sometimes be a bit annoying but I always enjoy reading them:

Honestly should probably trigger warning this thread because I feel like there will be listings so deeply bleak that it could undo months of therapy. May the great depression commence!


That top one:

“Must be daytime employed (not home based workers)”

Bit weird

When I get the chance I’ll link to some Dublin ones. Some disgraceful stuff that’s been going on for years.


Dublin is being totally hollowed out and commodified by the absolute fucking dregs of humanity.

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Dublin rental is basically like that episode of peep show where Jez lives in super Hans’ bath.


Wanting to rent a place to yourself really is just a tax on being single isn’t it.


Find it amazing how many urban councils will often have housing strategies and local plans that completely emphasis delivery of “family housing”, even in situations where people with families just don’t want to live. Seeing it now loads with talk about how to use town centres post-Covid.

It’s often an issue with statistics and data collection and its laudable in some ways, but it also completely defies housing market trends and in a lot of cases you just get three bed flats sold to landlords and crammed with young people.

Pure shit, just let people build studios and one-bed flats ffs


Maybe they work nights

Big B&Q fan


Said this in the other thread but they clearly just want/need someone to pay a chunk of their mortgage but cba with the “hassle” of actually having a tenant with rights.

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“part benefit” what. it sounds illegal.

I would absolutely live for a well designed 1 bed with intelligent storage solutions (and I’m not talking about beds that you can fold up into the wall :grimacing: ). It doesn’t have to be huge, I just need enough room for a few small furnishings and a wardrobe, oh my god, GIVE ME A WARDROBE it makes me sick when bedrooms cannot fit a double bed and a wardrobe.

Surely it will have to change with more people working from home and needing the space to do so. I’m seeing more houseshares with a table and chair crammed in for WFH but, as I’m going to be nearly always working from home in future, I need a proper desk with proper space and storage - not some rickety table with no storage that isn’t the right height. Designers really are missing a trick with not prioritising 1 beds, esp as so many are priced out of having kids that there surely won’t be that much of a demand for endless new family homes (which as you say are getting snapped up by landlords anyway)

Are studios that popular? I can’t stand the thought of my clothes being in the same room as the kitchen tbh but I suppose it’s in the design.

Really wish the landlord supremacy could just be over asap.


I’m currently looking for a new place to live too. Saw this last week and felt compelled to sent the agent a message of absolute disgust

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I lived in a couple of studios in London bitd cos I was desperate to live on my own and they were 70%-ish of the price of a 1-bed. One was pretty big tho and had a separate kitchen! Also I only eat bland stuff. Appreciate it isn’t for everyone but I think they serve a role.

Part of the problem is the planning system supposedly represents local corporate interests - which are generally skewed because young people don’t engage, and is incredibly slow to respond (7ish years on average to get a plan in place) to changes. So even if anyone wants to build stuff, if the policy environment is unfriendly or risky, they just won’t try. Flats have more risk than houses generally, so they just fall off the radar.

Pocket Homes are good for small, well-designed stuff. But they only mainly
build for sale, and in London.

Fucking hell. £775 a month! Absolute vultures


It’s a kitchen with a bed in it!

always good when the bed has to be at a weird angle in order to get the door open

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The Oxford rental market is a fucking laughing stock.


It certainly is. Despite slagging it off recently I’ve been looking at Abingdon too!

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Reposting from the other thread because this is an absolute fucking shithole with the washing machine behind the toilet FFS