Terrible things people post on social media

it’s yumo, mate

Best (partial) sentence I’ve read today

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Saw a post on Facebook the other week that said something like ‘share this if you love a full English breakfast and not one of those foreign baguettes’. It looked like a parody of something that a UKIPer might post. Think I might start drinking coffee out of a bowl just to annoy them

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that couple who refused to walk down the aisle thing is AMAZING

Not sure if this is the place to post it, but I feel it would be a waste not to share. Almost lost in a rambling, incoherent rant about our PTA is this little beaut.

Imboseals.

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Can’t stop thinking about this, the pure delicious irony. I made this last night to reply to her post, but the aggro it would provoke would be large and wide-ranging, so I’ve completely bottled it and I’ll make do with putting it here. She’s an awful woman though, so I’ll hold it in reserve.

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do it do it do it

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‘Be like Dave’

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"A lady on Question Time just said she is having trouble explaining Hilary Clinton and Donald Trump to her primary children, how hard can it be?

On one side you have a big Orange Man with silly hair, who dislikes anyone who isn’t white, even though he is Oranger than a wotsit. Big Orange Man also wants to build a wall to keep away the Mexicans, but he doesn’t have any lego to build the wall with or any friends to build the wall for him, so he wants the nice Mexicans to bring their lego and build the wall for him. But then he won’t let the nice Mexicans come in and play when the Mexicans have built the wall and also he’s going to make them pay for building the wall. Big Orange Man has many crazy supporters who want to “Make America Great Again” even though no one is quite sure what this means, the best guess is it means a return to the days of the 1950’s, when anyone who wasn’t a good ole white Christian boy from Alabama was a second class citizen.

On the other side you have a Petulant Little Lady who is married to a former president, because of this she always storms to the front of class and believes this entitles her to play with everyone’s toys, even though 8 years ago the rest of America told her to go away because they preferred nice Mr Obama. Petulant Little Lady, likes fights, she really likes big fights, actually whenever there is the opportunity to vote on a big fight, she has voted for them, this sounds a lot like that nasty man who we used to know Mr Bush. Petulant Little Lady also likes accepting money from anyone and everyone, it really doesn’t matter who they are, she has actually spent more on this election than Big Orange Man who is a billionaire and Petulant Little Lady likes to make sure this money stays with her friends, The Wall Street Gang who don’t like sharing their toys with anybody from outside this gang.

While all this is happening in the corner we have nice Grandpa Bernie, Grandpa Bernie was a very sensible man, but because he wasn’t rich, he wasn’t allowed to play with the toys, even though he had enough friends to make sure the evil Big Orange Man never would have had a chance in the first place. Now for the next 4 years America is screwed, until in 2020 when nice Mrs Warren or Mr Castro can sort this entire mess out."

^ the nadir of British Berniebros having a little cry

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He’s got enough on his plate.

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NSFW

http://66.media.tumblr.com/630c576e17fec5147f5870b98ee04f6c/tumblr_ogpu77KVV51qkrhj5o1_250.png


http://67.media.tumblr.com/eb927adc1df7697af4b290ec4b33cc2a/tumblr_ogpu77KVV51qkrhj5o4_250.png

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Got a wannabe politician/journalist on facebook who I assume has twitter set up to automatically post his tweets on his facebook feed, but acutally copying the text rather than a link to the tweet, so you get all this annoying, no-context junk like
Shame no full account of the stats on migration from nonEU. Need responsible approach @FaisalIslam #BBCqt

Jonathan Pie

https://scontent.flhr3-2.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/15965452_10155111411257223_1294580836923936969_n.jpg?oh=15c6db37259e076eed07e09ff8da47d5&oe=58D9BDA6

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And the over-defensive reactions.

Teenage album lists

I’ve been seeing some of those Be Like Bill things again, except he seems to be Bob now.

Be Like Bill, Bob, And Go Away

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“Get up to much this weekend?”
“Nah, quiet one. You?”
“Oh, I arranged pictures of David Jason at various ages into a 3x3 square. Stuck it on Facebook, hope it gets a few likes and shares. He deserves it.”
“I see…”
“Noticed you haven’t got round to sharing it actually, reckon you’ll have time this afternoon?”
"…"
“He’s a national treasure after all”

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