The Inaugural Thursday Puritan Thread


#1

Hello and welcome to the inaugural Thursday Puritan Thread, established as a strong moral objection to our culture of Filth Threads and definitely nothing to do with me being lonely or procrastinating.

This thread is a place to hang out with fellow puritans to discuss all things puritan! Please note that I have set out a platter of stale wholemeal bread over there on the east wall, but dare not ye take of it for it is a test to weed out the heathens who should be tempted by its brazen whole grain wiles.

But now on to the order of business:

This week’s puritalking point!
What’s your polity? Episcopal, Presbyterian, or Congregational?


#2

If it was physically possible to slobber over your own genitals, would you try it at least once?

  • Yes
  • Of course

0 voters


#3


#4

I laughed out loud and dribbled on my thigh.

Close but not close enough.


#5

hello fellow puritans


#6

have you noted the table of stale wholemeal bread?

well, have you?


#7

the inconvenient moisture is punishment enough for the devilrous mirth


#8

it’s still a little too soft


#9

Gah! So you have supped from the teat of my Christ-righteous morality prank! Why, you are no puritan at all!


#10


#11

Horsehair britches

    • Inappropriate attire to enter into covenant with God
    • The Lord of Lies has bewitched your house

0 voters


#12

The poll is now open for all to see, secrecy being the devil’s sweetmeat