The jogger who knocked a woman over


biggest shitcunt in london


i reckon he’s just forced some intern to take the rap for him


“do i get paid for this?”

“no but it’ll look really good on your cv!!!”


You’ll get some really valuable first hand experience of the UK legal system


“i simply overbalanced officer, i thought i’d challenge myself to run with excess weights so my pockets were full of blood diamonds and child organs.”


GBH with intent can carry a life sentence at its most serious. There isn’t really a more serious violent offence you can be charged with if you haven’t killed someone.


We could invent attempted manslaughter for those purposes?


yep, it’s worse


“Bellquist works for Hutton Collins Partners, which owns restaurant chains Wagamama and Byron. He sits on the boards of the restaurant chains as a non-executive director. He previously worked for the failed US investment bank Lehman Brothers.”

if it’s not him then it is a shame that he’s been wrongly accused of this but ew imagine that was your cv




I think we can be confident enough that he’s done something prison-worthy to lock him up.


The first thought that occurred to me was that that looks like the CV of a man that any passing acquaintance would take the chance to falsely finger for a GBH charge if the suspect looked a bit like him.

He was probably dobbed in by his gardener.


my name is jogger and i’m here to say
i pushed a woman in front of a bus today


Yeah, go on then, write to your MP.


I’ve tried that a couple of times before - she’s not exactly what you’d call responsive.


Was a really tough choice, actually.


I see you made the wrong one m9!!!11


Oh it’s like that, is it?!


Should’ve put ‘Joggers (Tory option)’.


Attempted manslaughter doesn’t really make any sense.