#1

The Gazprom Maoam Crystal Maze World Cup of Everything 2019

Good morning and welcome to the World Cup of Everything. We have 16 fabulous competitors waiting to battle it out to be crowned ‘literally the best thing in the world’

Firstly I would like to say thank you to Richard Osman for making all of this possible. The excellent book ‘World Cup of Everything’ is available to buy now in all good book shops.

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The 16 competitors will be split into four groups. We’ll vote on the groups one-by-one to allow for maximum discussion. The top two from each group will go through to the Quarter Finals this afternoon.

The group stage will begin at 10am UK time…

BUT FIRST

It has come to my attention that all competitors in the World Cup of Everything have earned their place… except one.

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It is surely only fair that the Boost bar, as much as I love it, should have to beat SOMETHING to earn its place in the final 16.

So I’m playing my Joker card (my JOKEr card, if you will).

Four things. One qualifier for the final 16 of the World Cup of Everything.

I’m sorry @Avery, @anon19035908

  • Boost
  • Eurovision Song Contest
  • The Muppets
  • Jamie Vardy

0 voters

You have two hours.

1 Like
#2

I really appreciate you playing the @JokeÂŽ mate. Boost being there just made a nonsense of the mix of the other options.

1 Like
#3

Well, if these early votes are anything to go by, The Muppets are going to DICK Boost and steal its spot in the finals.

Some top class drama to start this World Cup.

Let’s have a look at the schedule.

1000: Group A Voting
1100: Group B Voting
1200: Group C Voting
1300: Group D Voting
1400: Quarter Finals Voting
1500: Semi Finals Voting
1600: Final and 3rd Place Playoff Voting
1700: Winner crowned and @Joke gets rid of his Osman avatar

A packed day of fun and adventure awaits, pals.

6 Likes
#4

Boost

#6

I can’t believe you’ve done this. This fucking stinks. Who got to you? Who are you working for? What a fucking disgrace.

3 Likes
Meanie of the Week (MOTW) Nominations 02/08 - 09/08
#7

Big muppets.

10 Likes
#8

I love a Boost. But you can’t deny it’s unfair that it gets a spot without beating anyone.

1 Like
#9

THAT WAS THE BEST PART!

#10

Nice

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2 Likes
#11

don’t get me started

2 Likes
#12

Funkhouser,

As you know, this World Cup is all about transparency, fairness and logic.

I simply couldn’t let Boost through without a fight.

I’m deeply sorry this has upset you but I hope you can forgive me in time.

Yours,
Jook

1 Like
#13

@tilty, @Epimer, you’ve both done something very noble and brave here today. It won’t be forgotten. Big Boost thanks you.

#14

Gonna be furious when you make a mockery of this schedule

4 Likes
#15

Thank you, I appreciate both the content and format of this response. You’re a professional, and that has been evident throughout this slick and well-organised process. I just know we can move on from this. And you know the worst part?
.
.
.

I NEVER LEARNED TO READ!

2 Likes
#16

The Muppets is crap and for kids, you bunch of babies

#17

Ricky Gervais was in The Muppets and has never been in a Boost bar. Hope this informs your voting

3 Likes
#18

I wish

1 Like
#19

our first banning of the day folks

@unlucky is now banned from the thread

4 Likes
#20

“oH no I HAvE a MeETIng nOw, SEe yoU iN an HOuR”

4 Likes
#21

I’d just like to say thanks Joke.

I was bought the Osman book for Christmas. I haven’t read it yet, and now I’ll never need to!

Thanks again.

13 Likes