Cables.
Cables fucking everywhere.
Cables that are thick and tangled and fuck them right off.
Black snakes forever tangled and broken.
Plugs always in the wrong place.
Cables.
Cables fucking
everywhere.
FUCK OFF SHAREPOINT
I mean, thereās lots of research to support the issues I have with open plan offices, but if you like them then thatās cool.
Iāve an ex who was a sharepoint contractor - her day rate was insanely high on account of the fact that no-one apart from a masochist wants to go anywhere near that shit.
There might be on the 1st or 2nd floor which is full of 18 year old students. But not on any of the upper floors.
No free sockets
Air conditioning. Dries my eyes out and means i havenāt worn short sleeves in the office for at least 4 years because even in summer you have to dress like itās winter
We do not work in the same place
Cringeworthy attempts to be like the cool tech firms: scooters, lockers, etc.
Fucking cunting table-tennis tables
I think my least favourite part about working in an office is the work-related gossip. The āooh, did you hear such and such left the widget group and is now reporting to H Ballsack in sales?ā stuff. Literally never cared less about anything in my life and these people treat it like theyāve just told you your boss was caught fingering the CTOās mum in the disabled loos.
Beats being bullied to the point of abject misery, though, Iāll give you that.
Man, Iād kill to join H Ballsackās sales team.
Think you need a lot of cojones for that.
I do a lot of work gossip, gets me through the day. I should probably stop.
Youād have probably noticed me and said something if we did. If you wear a band t-shirt and someone else likes the same stuff you get talking, or if the band is the sort of thing you donāt generally see. Like a guy on this floor who was wearing a Germs t-shirt. We got friendly pretty quickly.
My old place was great for work gossip, because it was on the ādid you hear the partner in the corner office has broken up with the secretary heās been having an extra-marital affair with for years to move in with a clientā level. Someone I couldnāt care less about getting a new job title? Give a shit.
All day errr day (with a firm unspoken rule not to get on it before 4pm). Also free cider.
Oh I donāt like them for their panoptic qualities, not because people donāt do enough
Snorted laughing at H Ballsack and also the fingering reference.