Things that are difficult to judge


Olympic diving. How the fuck is it possible to accurately judge a dive in real time?


If i have a second pint at lunch i’d text in sick and turn my phone off, no doubt about it.


The cover of Razzle is generally a decent enough indication of the contents. I’m told.


Any of those “how many sweets in this jar” competitions at county fayres. Could be anything between 100 and 6000. No idea.


how much pasta to put in


mega city one


Wedding present choices


Cash. Easy


How much to drink before watching live football and enjoy it


I have never ever taken enough cash on holiday with me. Always end up paying some extortionate rate of exchange when I draw it out at an ATM machine with my PIN number.


A crisp fifty pound note tucked into the g-string of the groom


The correct level of banter in any given social situation.


Well Tone, at the museli bar I have a scoop that lives inside the museli part of the muesli bar and I have worked out that 5 scoops is the ideal amount of scoops of museli.


How much milk though (or non-dairy equivalent)?


George Best


the amount of time that has gone/is left when watching a film at the cinema


Well Tone, I like to have a mix of plant based milk with some water. I use the same small bowl each time so I know to cover the museli just about with plant milk and then a splash of water from the brita.


I’m glad that you have found a system, I endeavour to find one of my own…


*Brassneck (obvs)


Create a muesli bar and you can!